Still haven’t left the house
I couldn’t sleep last night as I felt wired. I took some Benadryl and had a wicked hard time getting up when I was supposed to. In fact, I went back to sleep only to wake up around the time of my appt. Oops. I don’t know how much of it was scared of going or not. It is a big deal to me and the thought of being criticized or being told I was too old or whatever was too much. I mean what if I don’t have enough to have what I want? I know it would send me into a suicidal spiral.
I got up and had some coffee. To my surprise, the puppy didn’t hide from me, as she came right when I went down the stairs. I think giving her treats has helped. She gave me a heart attack when I went to my room after my shower as she was in my room. She ate some of my dirty tissues. Thank god she didn’t pee or shit though. She sat for me so I know she wanted more treats but I already gave her a handful.
I’ve felt sick most of the day today. I feel like I am coming down with something. I have been smelling dog pee all day, even in my room. I think I might have tracked it in on my slippers. I have a headache. My neuro got back to me early this morning about the tremors. She thinks it is the Depakote and asked if I wanted to reduce it. I said I will live with it as it is helping my headaches. Risk/benefit was more important to me. Thank god she didn’t want to do an MRI. I hate them. I didn’t do well during my last one. I nearly pushed the panic button.
My sister canceled plans with me tonight to go out after work. I will see her tomorrow as she is taking me to the farmer’s market to get some food. I’ve never been and hope they have more than just vegetables. I am a carnivore and need my protein.
midnightdemons7 