midnightdemons7

Pressures

I didn’t wake up with a headache today or a migraine but I did wake up to pressure in my head. I had three phone calls today that roused me from my sleep. I got up around one for coffee as I had my meeting with my advisor at 130. The meeting lasted all of less than ten minutes. She basically just looked at my classes and said I had 18 credits left. I had miscalculated. I don’t need to take 3 classes for one of my last three semesters, just two classes. YAY! After next semester, I can take whatever the fuck I want as there are no more requirements for me to take. The end is coming.

I then had therapy. It was a mixed session. I had to explain to her what the spoon theory was. She had never heard it before. All I kept thinking about during session was that I had to groom and shower, groom and shower. But I forgot to brush my teeth. I will do that tonight before bed. I am cutting therapy to once a week because I need to attend class on Mondays. But I just got an email from my history professor and our classroom is ready! We are back to in person. I am relieved. It is the same classroom. I now need to go back to the grocery store for some bologna and bread. I need to have lunch in between classes.

I did shower and groom. I felt so much better after my shower. But now my foot is flared up and I have a slight headache. I tried doing my gender studies work but I can’t fucking think of something to say.

I had bought some stuff for a meal to make the other day. I was going to make it today but I don’t have enough energy. I will make it tomorrow. I don’t know how long it will take. Hopefully not that long but I know it will be at least three pans. I actually just checked the video on how to make it and it is much easier than I thought. There is no baking involved so just two pans. The person that made it said it takes 15 mins but we’ll see. It is a spinach sausage cheese pasta dish. It looks really good.

I am going to try and get back to the gender homework and read the next chapter. Hopefully this headache doesn’t intensify.

Lousy day with yet another migraine

I woke up with a killer migraine and didn’t sleep so great. I got about two hours and then woke up around 4 to pee. My head was still killing me and so was my foot and ankle. Around 1 I took pain meds. If I was going to be up, I might as well be in less pain. I couldn’t really sleep anyway. I was hurting too much between my head and foot.

I had my meeting with my psychiatrist. I told him I didn’t want to be alive anymore because the CRPS was out of remission. He asked if I needed additional support and I told him no. I was too busy to be admitted somewhere. It would only disrupt my studies. He said he did the paperwork so he could talk to my therapist.

Because I feel so lousy, I won’t be getting extra credit for going to a lecture tonight. I was really looking forward to it but I slept all afternoon with Honey. I feel so shitty. I told my psychiatrist it was tough trying to do all the schoolwork. My grades aren’t so bad right now but can get worse if these damn migraines don’t go away.

I got a message from my neuro that this would be the last steroid pack given and that other options will need to be tried if this continues. I realized I don’t have an appt with her so I responded to the nurse. Never got a response back. Fuck. I will call tomorrow.

I see my advisor tomorrow to get the hold off my acct. I will be registering for my 400 level psych course and another history class with the same professor. Unfortunately, the classes are spread out 4 days a week, so I will be on campus M-Th. Class time is roughly the same. I will be taking Principles of Psychotherapy for my psych class. I hope it will be fun. I am just taking the American history class because I love history.  I just wish my mind was more open to it and kept the things I learned. Fucking brain, man. Maybe I am too old for this.

Tiring day 14102026

I woke up tired. I had a few times during the night were I had to wake up to pee and then couldn’t go back to sleep right away. I was tossing and turning. I couldn’t get comfortable. Or I would get comfortable then have to pee again. I had to get up because I had my history quiz and I needed to get the steroid pack from the pharmacy.

I got up and made coffee and then I cuddled with the dog for a bit. She was upset her mommy wasn’t home. I got dressed and then went to the pharmacy. It wasn’t busy and I got something to eat. Now I am craving pancakes so I think I am going to make them.

I took my quiz and right at the start my bowels decided it needed to go. I fucking crapped my pants and was not fucking happy. I couldn’t pause my quiz so I just let it run and quickly did my business which had to be done at my sister’s because my nephew was taking a shower. I answered the best I could and after the exam it corrected part of it and I got three answers wrong. Fuck. I hope I don’t get a bad grade because of it.

I am free now to do whatever. I am tired but also hungry so I am going to make those pancakes. Been a long time since I had them from scratch. I miss cooking and baking. I wish I had a good pumpkin muffin recipe. I would love to make those. I had bought a Chimichanga at the pharmacy and then I took the steroid meds. I have decided to take them all at once rather than divided them up during the day. I don’t care.