Author: Midnight Demon

I had no sleep last night and have been up since 9am yesterday. My foot was hurting all night long. I was expecting rain today but it never came. I also didn’t go out again.

I mostly played my game today and was on social media. I wasn’t in the mood for anything. Just been tired all day and not able to sleep. My psychiatrist got back to me this morning. He thinks my PTSD symptoms are to blame for the increase in anxiety. Wants me to talk to my therapist. I don’t see him till Sept so there is nothing he can do. He annoys me. I don’t know why I bother.

Because I was up, I followed the game. We won. I was happy. The new guy that we got in the trade got hurt last night. He has a broken wrist so will be out a few weeks. Always something.

Fucking emotions all over the place

I woke up before 9. I tried to get more sleep but I couldn’t so got out of bed around 10. I had my coffee and a breakfast sandwich. I used a creamer instead of sugar so I couldn’t finish the coffee. I didn’t finish the sandwich either. I was on social media or my game until therapy. I was feeling kind of down. Therapy we talked about a little of everything so my emotions were all over the place. I miss my puppy. She is with her daddy right now. I hope he brings her home soon.

I had lunch after therapy and then I made another cup of coffee. For some reason, it didn’t taste right so I didn’t finish it. I used sugar this time. I think I am over this brand of coffee and need to find a new one. It’s hard to find one that I like that doesn’t cost a lot. I had every intention to go out and pick up my meds today but then I laid down and got a migraine. That was the end of going out. It was too bright for me to go out. The sun hurt my eyes. I didn’t get the migraine on the usual side of my head. I got it on my left side. I hate when it switches sides on me. As I was lying down, I got an anxiety attack with palpitations again. This is the third time this has happened in the last few days. I sent a message to my psychiatrist. We’ll see if he responds. I am not hopeful.

There is going to be rain and storms the rest of the week. The storm that was 70% for Thurs is now 100%. That is going to be fun walking in it. I hope I catch it in between downpours and there isn’t flash flooding. My head will be exploding the rest of the week. My allergies have been off the rocker today. I used Flonase to try and break up the post nasal drip but it didn’t do much good. My nose is so itchy. Pollen count is medium. My sinuses have been feeling it too which doesn’t help my headache.

I have been moody most of the day. I sat with my sister tonight after she got home from work. It helped. We talked about random things. She asked if I wanted to go to a Sox game and I said I was boycotting them because of what they did to my “hubby”. I still miss him. I don’t think I will be listening to the game tonight as I am wicked tired and the game doesn’t start until 940pm. They are on the west coast right now. I follow them because they are my team and I love them still even though they kill me sometimes. They have been doing much better the past month and I hope it continues.

A Lazy Sunday

I’ve been up since 530 or so. I couldn’t go back to sleep. I took my morning meds. I stayed in bed till 10 or so. Then I got up to have my coffee. I had leftover cornbread from last night’s dinner so I had that with the coffee. Honey is still with her daddy. I don’t know when he is bringing her back. I hope it is soon.

Around 1230 my sister texted me to come down as they were sitting outside. I took a bag of recycling with me. It was a nice day. My brother in law was doing yard work which made some dust around us. The sun was hard to get away from. I was waiting for my niece to come over. My sister made burgers and hot dogs. I had some. My other sister brought out ice cream after we ate. It was nice. I am full now. I kept track of the game. We won 6-0.

I am tired. I still need to do my meds. I never read last night like I wanted to. I ended up going to bed after the game ended. My allergies are killing me today. Post nasal drip keeps gagging me and no amount of water thins it out. It’s stuck in my throat. I hate it. I did manage to brush my teeth carefully so I wouldn’t gag.

I have been trying to see what my textbooks are going to cost me for the fall and for some reason, I can’t fricken access the information. I had to email the bookstore for help. I tried clearing the history, refreshing the page, but nothing I do is giving me what I want. Ugh.

I am going to try and make it out of the house tomorrow to get my migraine med tomorrow after therapy. I am a day late. Hope this doesn’t cause more headaches. Storms are predicted for Wed and Thurs. I have an appt with my pcp Thurs. I hope it clears up by then.