Saturday Blog 28032026

Saturday Blog 28032026

I slept nearly 12 hours last night. I woke up around 930am to pee. I took my meds and then went to sleep for a couple of more hours. I wasn’t ready to face the day. I haven’t done much in the last two days but lay in bed. I did read a chapter last night that was sort of a review of what I know about the cell cycle. I just hope we don’t have to memorize the shapes of the different phases like I did when I took Anatomy and Physiology. I haven’t read anything today because the Sox game took up most of my time this afternoon. It went into extra innings just to lose the game after tying it up. The starting pitcher, who struggled all through Spring training, sucked big time. He used to be a good pitcher. No more.

My niece and her ex left the puppy. I plan on sleeping with her tonight as I don’t think they will come home. She slept on my leg while I was listening to the game. I am just waiting for my phone to charge before going downstairs. My feet are ice cold and I had to put thermal socks on. Temps are in the 30s again. They will go up on Mon. I plan on shaving my head then, hopefully before therapy. The rest of the week calls for rain and one day snow. It might change though as it is just 50% or lower chance of it happening. Wed it is supposed to rain. I have class that night.

Mon I need to pick up my meds and get my T pass for the new month. I also need to pick up some Powerade as I am totally out and I can’t order more until Fri. I had the weight loss drug dose yesterday and my stomach is hurting today. I think it was the coffee or could be the chicken sandwich I had. I feel nauseous. I am running low on my Zofran. It is the med I need to pick up on Mon.

Last night I was feeling so much psychache. I thought about writing to my therapist but she won’t see it until Mon morning. I don’t know if she know what psychache is. The pain is becoming unbearable and now it is taking on some physical pain in my chest. Like the pain that I have been having the past couple of weeks. I don’t know how much is physical and how much is psychological. It just feels like a weight on my chest. Comes on at night. Sometimes I just think about death. Everything feels like a struggle, continuing my degree, being in therapy, taking meds, etc. This class is taking an awful lot of mental energy in addition to physical energy by trying to be there three days a week in a row. Next semester won’t be that difficult as I only will be there twice a week for one class and the other is online. But I often wonder if it is worth my efforts. I know I want my degree but it is so hard with the depression. I would be done if I wasn’t so depressed and can handle more than two classes a semester. I know there is going to be a semester where I will have to take three classes to avoid a summer course. Hopefully, I can take classes that are fun and are electives so the grade doesn’t matter.