No rest days this week
I realized today that I have something every day and it involves going out. I am so tired. I went to campus three times this week. It took me forever to get there tonight. The red line was delayed soon after it left my station. I left my house around 330 and didn’t get to campus till 515pm. It normally takes me 45 minutes to get there. I was contemplating going home but decided to stick it out. I finally learned something that I understand. I came home and we were moving along until I was four stops away from my station. Then we were delayed. I just wanted to go home and have pizza. My leg was killing me with the swelling and when I took my sock off, there was a sizeable dent in my leg. No wonder it was so painful.
I had therapy today and to my surprise, she didn’t know anything about reasons for living. It is in the safety plan that I avoid because I think it is a guilt trip. She said she is going to look it up. I think I might be smarter than my therapist, or at least more knowledgeable than her. We talked about Honey because this morning I stepped in shit and nearly fell. I didn’t have time to make coffee before therapy. I was too tired to get out of bed. I don’t remember what else we talked about. I went back to sleep afterwards.
When I got up, I had my coffee but nothing to eat. I wasn’t really hungry. I just had one cup because my stomach was starting to get upset. The pup didn’t want to go outside. I petted her and then I brushed my teeth and shaved. I really didn’t feel like shaving but it had to be done or it would have been too long. I like the goatee I have right now. The hair on my chin is filling in nice. Today was shot day so after I shaved, I took it.
Tomorrow I have an appt with my DMH worker in the afternoon. I am planning on going to the grocery store after the appt. I need half and half and I want hot dogs as I have been craving them for some time now. Friday I have an appt at my pcp’s office for my leg swelling. My leg is so painful right now. I hope I can sleep.
midnightdemons7 