Saturday Blog 11022023

Saturday Blog 11022023

I got up later than I had planned today. I woke up around midnight to pee and found it difficult to get back to sleep. Then when I did, I didn’t want to get up. I showered, shaved, and brushed my teeth. Then had two cups of coffee. While having my second one, my aunt came over. We got a lot of visitors today. My mother’s friend came over, then my cousins and her kids. It was a fun afternoon but tiring. I am done with having visitors over the house. It is exhausting hosting someone every day.

My mother’s friend had asked about who “G” was. I had to explain that I was trans and then she implied that it was the “in thing” to do. WTF. Didn’t help my aunt was using the wrong fucking pronouns. I was so annoyed. I had shaved off my beard and should have kept it. It was just getting itchy so I had to shave it off.

The rest of the day went ok. It was better when everyone left. My mother laid down so a few people left and then she went back to the kitchen only to go to the living room. She was like a fucking yo-yo. I had ordered pizza for dinner and ate nearly the entire thing myself. It was so fucking good. My mother had leftover lasagna. Then she had wine.

I was full after eating all the pizza. I was also tired from everything. I had to take a nap so I didn’t write this right away. I thought about what to write but I don’t know what my problem is lately. I seem to be in this standstill of having an idea of what to write but being afraid to write it. I get frozen. And then I don’t write anything. So frustrating.

any thoughts?

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