didn’t think I would write

Didn’t think I would write

Didn’t think I would write today but decided to. I am feeling anxious. My surgeon’s office called twice today. Once to tell me not to take aspirin or NSAIDs from now until next week. I hope my knee doesn’t flare up. The second phone call was to see if I had a mammogram. I haven’t so I need to get one tomorrow evening. That makes three appointments for tomorrow. Ugh. I am just glad I was able to get an appointment this week.

I had therapy this morning. It went ok. She wanted to know how I am going to handle the stress of the week. I said I would be using take a step back and the DBT skill STOP. I also will be using music and probably showering more. I plan on taking a shower before bed tonight as I stink. I just sweat so much when I sleep. I really hope the sweat doesn’t cause an infection when I have my surgery.

I started off this morning getting misgendered by my mother and aunt. My aunt always talks it off as being old and I am like that is bullshit. It is just an excuse and it pisses me off. Then while I was in therapy, the other aunt came over and they started yelling. Over nothing as usual. I can’t stand them. I had started feeling a little dysphoria yesterday about the things on my chest. I want to shower but I don’t want to look down on my chest. Just sucks. I know they aren’t going to be with me for too much longer.

I finally brushed my teeth today after missing for two days. I was so glad I did it. Now if I can shower, that will really make me happy. I was able to shower. I just ran downstairs and did it really quick. I am so tired now. I was going to read my book but I don’t think I can concentrate. I just want to listen to Taylor and relax. I have a big day tomorrow.

any thoughts?

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