life is a flame it can burn out

Life is a flame it can burn out

I had therapy today and it didn’t go as I wanted it to. Part of the trouble was construction was going on and so I was having a really hard time concentrating on what we were talking about. I kept getting distracted. I honestly don’t remember now what we were talking about. I know I tried to change the subject and she didn’t want to let it go. I am so tired. I ended up not talking about how I felt about my birthday and now I don’t see her till the new year.

It’s cold today. I didn’t have energy to walk around the corner to get my meds so I had my cousin drop me off. I walked back and I nearly had an asthma attack. The cold air bothers me for some reason. It is cold in my room. I just put on a long sleeve shirt. I packed for the trip tomorrow. I just need to put stuff in my backpack. I found a pair of jeans that fit me. I knew I had more than one pair. It is in my closet, along with my hoodies. I tried to find my button down long sleeve shirts but they must be in the back where I can’t seem to move the stuff yet.

I have been up since like 6. I don’t know why I have been waking up early. I tried to sleep before the workers came but they were here around 730am so I couldn’t go back to sleep. I woke up hungry so I made something to eat. I am feeling tired now. I didn’t nap at all. I was kind of pissed off at my therapist after therapy and then frantic as I was wondering what the hell to pack. My bed is a mess again. I don’t care. I still need to put the recycle away. And I have a shit ton of boxes to bring down.

I had two cups of coffee today. I wanted a third but my sister kept moving my mug and I don’t know where she put it the last move. I was too lazy to find it so said fuck it. I packed some sugar as my sister said to bring it. I also will be bringing my half and half or it will be bad by the time we come home. I showered, brushed my teeth, and shaved my head. My right foot is hurting me and I don’t know why. Ugh. I nearly bit my tongue off earlier. I have to do something about my broken teeth before I get an infection in my tongue. It is so damn sore all the time now. I have to be careful with what I eat, making sure something isn’t too hard or it can get stuck in my tooth. I was eating pistachios and one of them got lodged in my broken tooth and it was such a bitch to get out. I love pistachios, too.