midnightdemons7

Saturday Blog 18102025

No kings day. It was a great turnout all over the US. I don’t know if it will do any good. It was a peaceful protest. If there was any altercations, I haven’t heard of them yet. I have been off the social media and only been on facebook which doesn’t always bring the news, so to speak.

I was restless last night so read until midnight or so. I slept until 2pm and then by 4 I was tired again so went back to bed. Now I feel more tired. I haven’t done any school work today but I will once I finish this blog. I am trying to catch up on my readings but it is slow going. Just a lot of stuff to read.

I got a message from my pcp yesterday that my bloodwork was good. My liver is mildly inflamed but better than what it was. So there is no physical reason for me being tired. Guess it is the depression. We talked about seeing someone interim at the office. They have therapists I can see. I put in a call to my insurance and Monday I will be getting a call with a referral. I got to call the ophthalmology place as they haven’t called me either and it has been more than a week. I got to get my records from my previous optometrist but it is a struggle to get there.

I haven’t had any weight changes in the last two weeks. I seem to be stuck. I guess I need to increase the dose, which my pcp said she will do when the time comes. She is glad I am losing slowly. I am too. I was talking about this with my sisters and they were not supportive. I just let them talk. I had some food today but not much as my stomach was kind of finicky. My med alarm for night meds went off and when I woke up, I was really nauseous. I took the Zofran with my night meds.

Tomorrow my sister is having everyone over for the football game. I don’t know if I will attend because I have so much reading to do. I might just stop by to grab something to eat and then go back upstairs.

Long day of walking around

I was sleeping late because I had insomnia last night. My pcp’s nurse called about noon saying they had a cancelation with my pcp and did I want it. I said yes. This forced me to get up and I was not happy about it. I had some coffee and played with the pup who was in a mood not to be dealt with. I let her be.

After my coffee, I decided to walk to the station. It was a cold day but not too cold. I took my time getting there. I left in plenty of time. I didn’t get short of breath or anything so that was good. I just felt tired. I went to Starbucks when I got to North Station. I had my latte with five shot espresso. It was good. Didn’t help the brain fog. I met my doc and we talked a good talk. She wants me to call the places for therapy. Then she examined me. She wanted blood work, which meant doing T levels at a different time. I see her in two weeks, unless the blood shows something.

I met with my DMH worker for an hour. I honestly thought we would meet for a half hour but it turned into an hour. I was tired. I hadn’t had anything to eat. I didn’t know what I want and I still needed to pick up my meds. I walked to the station and then waited for the train back home. Then I waited for the bus to the square. I ended up getting the rice dish I like. I didn’t get home till after 6. I had been out all afternoon. I was beat.

I got a headache. I keep checking to see if my bloodwork is back. It hasn’t come back yet. I tried to drink some water as all I had today was coffee. I only was able to drink a few ounces. I don’t feel that thirsty. I am going to go nap or try and sleep. I don’t care if I wake up in the middle of the night again. I like reading at that hour. It is when I can concentrate pretty good. Why it has to be between 2 and 4am I will never know. I made a note of who to call for tomorrow. If I call one place that will be good enough for me. My DMH worker wants me to have therapy at her place. We’ll see. I will call tomorrow and see if I get anywhere. I just hope I don’t have to redo the intake.

Good thing I like my friends canceled

I have been listening to Life of the show girl on repeat since it came out. I love this album. This has to be one of Taylor’s best. It reminds of reputation, but with swears.

I haven’t been doing well the past few days. I have been in bed, mostly sleeping. I have just been so tired. Yesterday I finally had something decent to eat and drink. I feel a little better today but I am tired. I did some stuff for school but haven’t started the mountain of reading I need to do. I dropped the Econ class because I failed another quiz. I would have stayed in it but the written part of the class isn’t until after P/F/W period and I can’t take a chance of getting a F. It was just causing me too much stress. I finally picked classes for Spring semester. I hate that they changed the designations for classes as it was hard to pick my remaining requirements. I made an appt with advising and hope that the sociology class I can take. I didn’t see anything saying they needed requirements and I already took sociology 101. I think I took another sociology class too, but don’t remember off the top of my head. It was a lot of years ago.

I took a shower because it has been almost two weeks since I last took one. I had some yogurt with my coffee. I need another coffee. Also need to take my recycling down as it’s trash day tomorrow. My bags are piling up. I am slowly clearing my bed still but I am getting there. I just need a burst of energy to finish it, which isn’t happening anytime soon. I just feel so low. I told my doctor but they don’t have any solutions. I see my doc in two weeks and I got bloodwork to be done next week. Last night I cut my nails as they were getting too long. I kept taking off skin when I scratched. Got myself good on my beard.

I woke up with a headache today but it seems to have gone away. I hope I don’t get a migraine. I took my meds early this morning. My vit D pill disappeared on me. Second time this week a pill has played hide and seek with me. I still haven’t found it. Tomorrow I see or at least talk with my DMH worker. I am going to try and stretch out the time we meet. Every two weeks is getting tough with class. She has no clue about trans stuff so I can’t talk to her about those things. She is clueless about what the White House is trying to do with transgender people. Pisses me off. I had a dream about it last night.

I think I am going to have a salad for dinner tonight. I didn’t take out a burger. I need to do a little shopping again. I ate my last yogurt. My sister bought half and half. I didn’t have coffee yesterday because we were out. I am going to see if my other sister will take me to the cheaper grocery store.