it’s 2am and I’m up

It’s 2am and I’m up

I woke up an hour ago to pee and couldn’t go back to sleep. I had a weird dream where I had to give a paper and have PT with TENS. But it was to be outside. As the teacher was reading my paper, my foot and ankle started to hurt very badly and I woke up from the pain. My ankle and foot are throbbing but not as bad as in the dream.

I slept most of the day yesterday. I had spent the morning dealing with medical issues. My pcp wants a vaginal culture and a urine specimen to test for infection. I also have to go for blood work for my TG doc. I will be going today to do this. I have to go to the clinic to do the vaginal test. I don’t know why she wants a culture when I have bladder pain.

Monday night I used the estrogen cream on my urethra. I made sure to rub it in so it didn’t just stay there. I waited four hours before I cathed. So far I am not irritated or anything. I am glad. I was so worried that it was going to cause problems when I cath.

I didn’t put myself on the alarm to pee so I didn’t wake up in time to go to the pain group. I really wanted to go but time got away from me. I was just so damn tired in the afternoon just had to sleep. When I woke up, I had to pee and then I made myself a bowl of cereal. I checked my messages and then went back to sleep until my med alarm went off for my night meds. I took them and then went back to sleep. I knew I was going to wake up after midnight to pee.

I have to see my neuro and neurosurgeon. I finally got through and made an appointment with my neurologist for Oct. I am still waiting to hear back from my neurosurg. I don’t think my neurosurg can do anything other than advise me on what if anything that can be done about the degeneration. I am seeing neuro for my numb clit. Neurosurg might be able to help with that as well. I have a good relationship with him so I feel comfortable telling him what happened.

I had sent an email to the transgender health program at the LGBTQA+ health center but I haven’t heard back from them. It was for a support group for trans. I hope I get a response from them. It is on zoom. I requested the link for the group.

My ankle is really hurting now. I just put drops in my eyes because my left eye was tearing really bad. I guess standing on it made it angry. I’m starting to feel sleepy. Going to take some gaba to see if that help bring down the throbbing pain. It is like a pulsation type of feeling, like if I had a TENS machine on or something. I have to make sure that I am hydrated before I try and get my blood drawn so it is easier to find my veins. I am such a hard stick because my veins are so deep. It sometimes takes two people to get me. I hate getting my blood drawn.

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