5000th post

I didn’t think I would have a blog this long. I’ve had it since 2013 or 2014. I’ve come a long way since those days. I was just thinking today about trans joy as I listened to Rob Thomas’ Someday. I wish I had more euphoric days but the depression is so bad right now. I am content with who I am and where I am in my transition. Hoping bottom surgery does more for me.

On my way to class, I got a migraine. I didn’t have my meds, just ibuprofen so took some. It took the edge off but then thunderstorms came in and my head exploded when I got home. I’ve been dealing with a migrainy headache the past few hours. I was up early. For some reason I seem to wake up at 4 on Tuesdays. I had breakfast and coffee. I also played with the puppy. She loves my affection.

Class was good. I need to submit notes for extra credit but my head is pounding me so will have to wait. I printed off some articles I want to read. I feel so depressed and suicidal. I picked a date. Maybe I won’t act. Maybe I will. I don’t know. I see my therapist tomorrow. I got a message saying it was virtual and it will have to be as I thought the appt was at 1 but it’s at 2 and I made an appt at 4. I don’t think I can be back home in time.

I’m pretty tired. I just finished off a pint of ice cream. Ben and Jerry’s fudge brownie. It had so many pieces of brownie. I love it when that happens. Sometimes there isn’t that much. I’ll probably go to bed early. My prof said that he gave us a pass for attendance last week. I’m glad because it was my 7th absence and it would deduct my grade. There are only 2 classes left in the semester. I am ahead in the reading for once. Thurs I need to do my Italian. I have a exam to do. Not sure if there is homework too. I got to check the module. Next week is the final quiz and then I’m done. I have between now and the 18th to write my Eng paper. I’ll probably get started on it over the weekend after I finish the Italian.