Not a bad day
I had some weird dreams during the night. All of them had me in a psych ward for being suicidal. I could actually feel the feelings in the dream. In one of them, my mother came to visit during lunch and sat near me. I left the table feeling disgusted. There was a train in the dream but I don’t remember now how it connected to anything other than another patient wanted to jump.
I got up early today, before nine. I had my coffee and then my sister called me saying she was home and did I want coffee. I was up for another cup because I had a migraine by that point. It was raining during the night and there was light rain, more of a sprinkle going on but not thunderstorms like they predicted. I got dressed before going downstairs with my second cup. I figured afterwards I would go to the post office as it was pretty clear. It was wicked humid in the house and kind of sticky outside when I left the house. I came home sweating. I needed a shower. I wasn’t sure if I was going to trim my beard. It is thicker than my hair right now. But I got in a fuck it mood and let it be.
It took me about two hours to finally go in the shower. I was tired after I washed up. I had to sit for a few minutes. I had to then rest on my niece’s bed after I dried off and got dressed. The puppy kept looking at me and when I looked at her she looked away. It was funny. She was ignoring me at times today but then got in an affectionate mood. She scratched my chest with her claws. I kept telling her I wasn’t going anywhere but she kept pawing. She is too funny.
I tried listening to music but my head couldn’t take it. I am torn between contacting my neuro about these headaches as I don’t know when they will end. I have had 5 headaches and two migraines in the last six days. I don’t really want to go on a steroid pack because by the time she orders it, the headaches usually resolve. Next door is doing some kind of construction so I have been hearing hammering all day today. My allergies have been terrible. Which reminds me, I need to replace the tissue box near me as I am out.
My pcp sent me the paperwork I needed for my long term disability. I hope they mailed it but I have it just in case they didn’t. They sent me a copy of it. She also reported that I have severe depression. I didn’t tell them about my therapist because I don’t want my therapy notes in their hands. They have no business knowing about what I say in therapy.
midnightdemons7 