in a depressive episode

In a depressive episode

I met with my psychiatrist this morning and he confirmed my suspicions that I am in a major depressive episode. We talked about options and for now will be tapering off my antidepressant to try something new. I see him beginning of Sept for a follow up before he is out of the office.

I then napped. I couldn’t get going even if you paid me. I had coffee and some pumpkin bread that I bought yesterday. It was very yummy. But it didn’t keep me awake. I woke up in time to text my DMH worker to call me as I wasn’t going in. I never showered and I stunk. I also needed to shave. The talk with the DMH worker went well. She thinks I am ok. I couldn’t tell her otherwise for whatever reason. I will talk to her again in a couple of weeks.

I made lunch. I had a turkey sandwich. I couldn’t finish it so gave the meat to the pup. She was happy. I then decided to shave and shower. I knew it was going to be hard because my back started acting up while I was brushing my teeth. It is still bothering me now. I feel so sleepy I want to take another nap.

Baseball is playing now. Snakes lost and Sox are winning for the moment. There is one more inning left.

I have been feeling down all week. Sometimes, suicidal. Headaches haven’t been helping. I also have been feeling anxious, which isn’t like me. I think it was because of the steroids. Yesterday was so bad, I had to take an Ativan. I couldn’t stand it anymore. I went to bed early and pretty much slept through the night. I have been exhausted lately and I don’t know why. I also don’t know why I keep getting headaches. I hope they are gone by the time the semester starts.