Body dysmorphia
Sox lost last night and I was upset about it. I couldn’t sleep until 2am despite taking a Benadryl and Ativan (at different times). My mind was awake. I didn’t know if I should read and what should I read that I would remember. I ended up just laying down to rest and somehow fell asleep within a half hour, 45 mins.
I woke up tired. I really didn’t want to get out of bed. But it was around noon and I had to because I had to pick up my meds and then I had therapy. I had coffee and half of a half sandwich that I bought yesterday. It was good. After session she sent me some sheets on activities that I could do to improve my mood. Nine pages. It’s a lot of different things. I decided to go to the pharmacy after 2 so I went upstairs and checked to see if I had homework for my networking class. I didn’t.
I went to the pharmacy and then my foot flared up when I got home. My ankle chimed in when I went to grab something. So throughout therapy I was in pain. I also had a sneeze attack. My allergies are off the rocker. I hate this time of year. Today was a pretty warm day. Tomorrow is going to be hotter. Then we go back to the 60s next week, with one day being in the 50s.
Honey was upset for most of the early evening. We fed her and then her parents left and she was sad again, wimpering and such. I went on the bed with her and her mom left some crime show on the TV for her. I decided to do one of my readings for the night so grabbed my book and then sat with her until she decided to lay in her dog bed instead of being near me.
The reading was about makeup and how women beautify their faces as well as what constitutes body dysmorphia disorder. Just reading about it, triggered me. I felt fat. I had made potatoes and chicken for supper but I just ate the potatoes. My stomach was full. I also had another cup of coffee so I could do this homework. Then one of my childhood friends posts that she lost 73 lbs in a year on the GLP1 drug. I was floored. I have only lost 20-25lbs in that same time period. I feel so fat right now. I took a shower and my back flared up. I needed to take one because it has been almost a week since my last one.
I am looking for another cell provider that is lower in cost per month than my current plan, especially as my current provider decided to increase charges.
