Author: Midnight Demon

One ends and another begins

I met with my current therapist today. About midway through session, I told her I started seeing a new therapist because I felt she was inexperienced for my needs. I apologized. I felt really bad and nervous about it. Then we just ended. She said that in a month we will officially discharge. That should give me enough time to figure out if the new therapist is working out or not. My next appt with the new therapist is in two weeks. I have a week with no therapist next week.

I had shitty sleep. I woke up around 2 am and was just itchy. My nose and chest, mostly. I took a Benadryl knowing I wasn’t going to be able to get up in the morning. I think I have a UTI again and need to give a urine sample. Today I don’t feel that way so maybe it was just irritation yesterday. I have been trying to drink more water. Today I need coffee though. I am glad it is not upsetting my stomach. Despite feeling tired, I feel ok physically. Last night I was in so much pain with my back, leg, foot. It was driving me crazy. I ended up taking a pain med for it.

I haven’t done any ADL’s today yet. I need to brush my teeth. I shaved yesterday so I don’t need to do that today. I should shower as I am kind of stinky. I just don’t have the energy for it. It is hot in the house despite having two AC’s running. My sister put the AC in the living room on and it’s cooling that part of the house. We really need one for the kitchen but the only way to do it is to put it in the wall. I didn’t cook today. I was too tired. I made a roll up of turkey and cheese. It’s all that I ate today. I had to have an Ensure last night to take the Latuda. I haven’t had much of an appetite the past few days. Tomorrow I need to weigh myself and give myself the second dose. My aunt just called me and we are going to lunch tomorrow. I hope I feel like eating. I know they have salad so I might have one. I have been craving a Caesar salad for days now. I just haven’t been able to get to the store to pick it up. I also need to get more half and half.

Sox lost last night. The bats were quiet. They are off tonight. They are in second place right now. I am happy about it. They have a chance to play in the playoffs if they keep up this pace. The snakes keep losing and I am happy about that too.

Up all night again

I fell asleep after the baseball game only to wake up around 2am to pee and sneeze my head off. I took an allegra. I couldn’t go back to sleep because the sneezing woke me up so I got out my new psych history textbook and read. I couldn’t put it down. It was so interesting. I am going to love this class. Least I hope I will. I have no idea what the professor is like as I never had her before but she is a good professor from what I heard from other students.

I had a hard time getting up once I fell back to sleep, which was difficult because my sister got up and I guess the puppy peed again upstairs. That is her new thing now. I waited till my sister left before going back to sleep. Then I woke up again to pee. I took my meds. I had some serious upset stomach during the night. I took some Mylanta. I asked the nurse if it was normal and it is. I am trying not to eat things that are heavy that will hurt my stomach. The mac and cheese was so good but it caused an upset. I just had a turkey sandwich for dinner and some iced tea.

I have been experiencing some UTI symptoms today. I must have peed like ten times since I got up. Each time was just a little bit of pee but it hurt so bad. I have been drinking water as I am low on my powerades. I am so tired. I was watching the puppy until my bitchy sister came home and then I went up to my room. She was in a mood again. I don’t know why she expects the house to be spotless whenever she comes home. People live here. There is going to be stuff out and not put away. That is how a house is run. Fuck.

My allergies are so bad today. The pollen count is high. I was sneezing in my room and in the kitchen. I need to get more tissues before I run out. I forgot to get them on my last grocery order. I managed to shave and brush my teeth today. The only thing I hate about having a goatee is that around my neck I get ingrown hairs and they are painful. They also last a long time. I try to leave them alone. I got some benzoil peroxide to put on them. I am going to try and see if that makes it go away.

Today is just a WTF day

I woke up to pee around 9 and took my meds but forgot to clear it on my med alarm. It went off an hour later and I was pissed. I had a hard time sleeping last night. Again, I couldn’t get comfortable and for some reason, I kept on laying on my back with my leg up which only made my back hurt after a while. I slept for a few more hours and then got up around noon. I had some coffee but didn’t eat anything as I wasn’t hungry.

My DMH worker called and we talked for a bit. I accidently hung up on her near the end of our talk. I keep forgetting the power button doesn’t lock my phone when I am on a call. It ends the call. I had another cup of coffee while I was on the phone with her. I needed it.

The felon is sending the National Guard into DC because of “crime”. I am just done with his style of governing. And it is only the first year. He already wrecked the country and it is only going to get worse. His meeting with Putin is a huge mistake and I can already see Putin laugh at him.

I just am tired today and can’t get the song “Ordinary” out of my head. My allergies have been out of control today. It is medium high today. I keep sneezing my head off. I don’t know what I am going to have to eat. I am getting hungry. My niece is making mac and cheese. I might have some of that. She makes it so yummy. I got to go to the grocery store and pick up some salad kits. I have been craving a Caesar salad.

I couldn’t get comfortable to sleep last night. I was up most of the night but was able to get up before my appt and have a cup of coffee. The therapist did a bunch of questionnaires and no surprise, I have depression. We talked a little bit about stuff but didn’t get into a whole lot. I really like her. Now I got to figure out how to tell my current therapist bye.

I ended up sleeping most of the afternoon. I kept an eye on puppy. She crapped in the living room but nowhere else. I am making potatoes and spanikopita. That is what I want to eat. I mostly just had cake and coffee this morning.

I took some old mail off my bed. I didn’t have much success clearing it today. Maybe tomorrow. I see my DMH worker. But I won’t be going in. Too hot.

I need to shave my head and face. I got a goatee going on. Also need to brush my teeth. Sox are playing a late game tonight. They are in Houston.