Category: depression

What a day

The last twenty-four hours have been wild. I went to the ED not even less than that and I was admitted for my migraines. Meds were not helping. No matter what they gave me, I still had a headache. Then one med they gave me let me sleep for about three hours before I was up again in another migraine attack. I have been up since 5am. They gave me another dose of this med and discharged me with it but unfortunately, it severely interacts with my Latuda so I can’t take it. ☹  The pharmacist refused to fill it without a doctor okaying it and because I am no longer in the hospital, they haven’t returned her faxes or calls so I don’t think I will be getting it. It’s fine with me because my it made my stomach hurt. I have been dealing with a touch of gastritis all day. I haven’t taken my stomach med. They didn’t give it to me with my morning meds. I had to tell them I take two other blood pressure meds even though the PA went over the list when I got to the floor. Idiot. They made sure I got the steroid dose though.

The migraine has gone away but I am left with rebound headache. It’s gotten a little better now that I have some food in me. I had to order McD’s because it is the only food I know that helps when my stomach hurts this way. I might have ice cream later. I was kind of dizzy as I left the hospital and I was worried about taking the train home. I didn’t want to take a cab because I had to pick up my med, or so I thought. I did end up getting some more half and half as I had to postpone my delivery for today for tomorrow and I am almost out. I don’t know what time the delivery will happen because they had to redo the order and it’s not in the app anymore. Ugh. I like checking the updates. I hope I get notified when they arrive.

My room was a million degrees. My stupid sister had shut the fan off but left my light on. I don’t understand the logic. It took a while wondering why my room wasn’t cooling down until I looked at the ceiling and the fan wasn’t moving. It’s cooler now but still has a little ways to go to be cold. I have been dealing with my chest wall pain for more than 24 hours now. The IV med made the pain worse but I didn’t tell anyone for fear of getting a cardiac work up for nothing. I just wanted to go home and take MY meds. I couldn’t believe the first round of meds was stuff I could take at home, mag, ibuprofen, Tylenol, and fluids. I don’t know why my head is hurting so bad after a fucking week. The doctor in rounds from neuro asked me what my triggers were and I basically said dreams. It is the only thing that sets them off. Other than bright light. Because holy hell, on really bright days, opening my door to light outside can trigger them. I didn’t bring my sunglasses with me and I should have. It was bright today, which didn’t help my fucking head. I have transition lenses but sometimes it takes a while to block out the light and I don’t really see a difference when it is activated. I would rather have the sunglasses.

I am just going to try and listen to the sox tonight. It is starting an hour later. I don’t know if I will be up as I am so beat. I haven’t been able to nap. I was almost ready to pass out while in the hospital and my fricken bladder said time to go. I was so fucking mad. I was all nice and comfy too, which being on a stretcher was difficult to do. I missed my bed and my pillow. Hospital pillows suck so bad.

I think the migraine shit is over. Today the weather was really hot. I didn’t sleep well as I got a migraine in the middle of the night. I have been feeling like shit all day. Stomach bothered me after a cup of coffee. I just ordered some food. My head doesn’t hurt but feels a ton of pressure. It’s hard to think. I haven’t eaten anything all day.

I met with my psychiatrist today. He is going to have some social worker reach out to me about partial program that is virtual as the other program didn’t work out. He is also going to see me a little more frequently as I am without a therapist.

I just want to sleep. My head feels so heavy. I haven’t done anything all week because of these stupid headaches. I was going to go to the ED today but fell asleep instead. I had to charge my phone. I forgot to put it on the charger last night. I had some weird dreams. I am so tired of this head pressure. If I don’t feel better after I eat, maybe I’ll go in. I might need fluids or something.

Headaches continue

I am at day 6 of headaches. Nothing seems to be working. I woke up in the middle of the night to pee and then got a screaming headache. It took a while to get it to calm down and for me to get back to sleep. I feel like total shit. I wanted to try and see if I can look at suits for my niece’s wedding coming up but I just couldn’t. If I get another headache tomorrow, I am going to the ED because this is ridiculous.

I napped a bit this afternoon after I had my coffee. I just had one cup. It is kind of humid today despite low temps. I just checked on my message I sent to the neuro and it was in “drafts”. Ugh. I sent it but it is late now. I probably won’t get a response till tomorrow. I was looking at the packet of steroids last night and realized I was taking them wrong. Oh well. It hasn’t done much, though the headache pain is decreased, still there but doesn’t hurt as much. I have brain fog that is clouding my thoughts. I want to read my textbook but I don’t have the capacity to take in new information right now. These headaches need to go away.

I am making a pot pie for dinner. I made burgers last night. I am not as hungry as I was yesterday. I’m glad the nausea is gone. That was terrible. I just want to sleep. I am so damn tired.

Migraine activity continues

Since Friday, I have had migraine activity. Some has been straight up pain, other times, I feel neuropathy around my head. I thought it was over as I woke up at 4am in no pain and was clear headed. I went to Starbucks and when I came home, my head was all tingly, like pins and needles. I contacted my neuro today and she is going to try a thing of steroids. I can’t think of what the term is called. If it doesn’t work, I am going to go to ED. Sounds are annoying me and so is light. I am glad today is cloudy, cool, and rainy. Only problem is neuro is going to put the script to the Square’s pharmacy and not the one around the corner from me so I will have to go out again.

My DMH case worker is back from vacation. She told me there is an event at the center where there is peer to peer support from individuals like me with chronic mental illness. I am not sure if it is a paid position or volunteer. It’s Thursday and I meet with my pdoc that day. I would have to go into Boston before my appointment so I could be there at the time the event happens. I hate not being on my laptop for his appointments because my phone does funky things with zoom. Last time it didn’t connect and I had to go one some other site to see him.

This blog isn’t going to be long because I am struggling to see as my head is pounding and I am nauseous. Damn, I forgot to take out burgers for dinner tonight. Guess I am having ramen, if my niece didn’t eat it all. She and I like the same foods so she eats mine but never replenishes it. I replenish and she eats. She is a mouse. I don’t mind but stuff is expensive and I sometimes want the stuff I buy, like my mac and cheese. I meant to buy it today and forgot.

I sent out two books today. I went to the post office and mailed it out. I also got customs forms for the two people I need them for. I hate filling it out as I have to put a value on the book and I have a hard time doing that. Hopefully my uncle’s check will come today so I can pay off my tuition for the month. Once that is settled, I will feel so much better. I wanted to try to read the textbook for the neuroscience but with this damn headache, that is a no. I should have known I was going to get a migraine when I got brainfog while at Starbucks. I thought it was just because I was up so damn early. I didn’t even have to pee. I just woke up feeling pretty good. Now I feel like total shit. Of course, all I have had to drink today was coffee beverages. I am trying to drink more water but it is hard. Plain water is boring.