My life as a lab assistant is over

My life as a lab assistant is over

As I was going through my things tonight of the things I collected from my work locker, I realized I have finally closed that chapter of my life. The days where I get stressed out over a nurse’s error or a doctor’s rant because he can’t get his lab results because he wants to go home are over. The days at decant and endless samples where the evening shift does more work than day shift have some to an end. My nights of getting called fifty times or more a night where all I wanted to do was change my name are gone.

It was a great learning experience for me. I learned what life was like after the people that draw your blood do with it. I learned many things over the years and it was both good and bad. I learned how mistakes could be made on inpatient floors and why they happen. Better mechanisms are now in place to prevent these but they still happen, unfortunately, though with less frequency.

This job that was once important to me and my livelihood is done and gone like a good memory. I remember the good more than the bad. Many people have passed through the years that I have been working there. It was a low paying job, a starting point for technologists and nurses or other medical professionals. I have seen a few co workers go on to become physician assistants and doctors. Through social media, I still keep in contact with them. We may not talk every day but it’s nice to speak to them every once and a while to see what they are up to.

It’s hard to believe that five years ago this month I went out on permanent disability. I am still angry that this happened to me despite my years of seniority to the hospital and my department. I was well liked, got good reviews, and still, in the end, got kicked out. I wasn’t accommodated with my restrictions and there was no place for me. I was talking to the manager today. I am no longer angry at him. I know he would have kept me had he had a say in the decision. It is upper management that couldn’t accept my restrictions. In a way, it all worked out. I wouldn’t have time for this blog if I was still working. Who knows, I may have ended up killing myself like I had planned. Every now and then, I still think of that plan. I never went through with it, obviously because I am still here.

Over the years, I have been called lazy and crazy by people that are too stupid to name. It was something that I have never forgotten or got apologized to. It hindered any sort of promotion that I may have had and I was okay with that. People, even supervisors, came to me with problems more than my title demanded. I was always willing to lend a hand when I could. Some times my advice was heeded and sometimes it wasn’t, much to my dismay. Those nights pissed me off because I was then asked to fix the error. There were laughs some nights, though in the end they became less and less frequent as the demand of work was piled on. But the people are what matter more than the work. That is what I will remember.

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About G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about
This entry was posted in chronic physical pain and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to My life as a lab assistant is over

  1. manyofus1980 says:

    you must have felt sad picking up your stuff from your work locker. i’m glad you have so many good memories. and your right, its the people who make the work environment worth working in. xx

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