I had therapy yesterday and it didn’t go well. She said that she doesn’t have time for second sessions anymore and frankly all I she does have time for is the 45 minutes she can give me on Mondays. I was taken aback and now I am struggling with the decision on finding a new therapist. I know I need at least twice a week sessions. She wants me to go to a DBT group but I don’t want that. Nothing gets talked about in DBT groups but the skill they are working on. They don’t care about what happens outside of group and frankly now my therapist is saying the same thing. I can’t text her and I am hesitant about sending her a message through the patient web thing because I don’t know if someone else reads the message before she does. I feel let down again by the therapy world. As Taylor says so eloquently, “I think I’ve seen this film before so I am leaving out the side door. Now I am in exile seeing you out.”
I had PT yesterday and was so exhausted from it. It gave me some time to get my mind of my therapy troubles. She had me on the treadmill and then another machine. My back hated everything and is still hurting. I should have rested today but I have a UTI and needed to drop off a urine sample to the lab. Afterwards I got my haircut. I still need a shower but that will happen after I blog.
I am going to talk to my psychiatrist about this to see if he can get me another therapist. If he can’t, I am not sure what to do. I really want to cancel and end seeing this therapist. I thought this therapist was going to help me in ways that other therapists had failed but wrong again.