Saturday Blog 20052023

I woke up around 130 and I checked the baseball game score. We won 6-1. Tonight is another late night ball game so I probably will wake up again in the middle of the night to check the score. I was up till after 3 when I was able to get back to sleep. I thought about my mother. I played Taylor until I woke up around 530 to shut it off so I could get some deep sleep. Dealing with the loss of my mother has been so hard. I keep wanting to check on her downstairs or to call her to see if she needs anything. I miss her so much. It hurts so bad.

I got up around 1130. There is no butter and the margarine needs to be thawed out so I wasn’t able to make an egg sandwich like I wanted to. I made hash browns instead. They were good. I had three cups of coffee so I should be able to stay awake for a while. My only goals today is to brush my teeth and shower. I finally will be able to shower without having to put on a binder or anything for the first time since surgery. I am seven weeks post op. I am happy I had the surgery.

My nephew is home otherwise I would be alone again. My sister and niece went out somewhere. I made her a hash brown but she didn’t eat it yet. I hate when the house is so quiet. It is eerie. I made a cheeseburger with turkey bacon and had another cup of coffee with it. I need to get more half and half. I might go out tomorrow to get it. Just hope it isn’t raining.

My CRPS foot and ankle has been acting up the past few days. Last night the burning caused me to be up for a few hours. It was aching so bad. Today it is not any better. It still hurts. I hate that I waited so long to get on the right pain meds only to be taken off them for no reason. I am so mad. I talk to my pcp in June about my pain. I got such a headache right now and I don’t know why. I just want to nap. I had four cups of coffee and I am still tired as fuck. I was able to brush my teeth but I don’t think I am going to shower today. I have lost my energy to do it.