no such thing as bad thoughts

No such thing as bad thoughts

I’ve had nothing but arguments with my bitch sister today and I feel really depressed because she thinks I do nothing but stay in my room, sleeping. Truth be told, there isn’t a place I can go. The living room is my niece’s bedroom. And it is too hot outside. The kitchen isn’t really comfortable. I rather be in my room on my bed and be comfy. She just makes me feel like I shouldn’t exist.

I managed to brush my teeth and shave. I want to shower but I have done so much already, I don’t know if I should. I vacuumed my rug. It was hard because it was a hand held vacuum that kept getting stuck. I had to keep clearing it out. I had put some carpet freshener powder to try and make my room smell better. I then did my meds for the week. I kept track of the baseball game. We won again. I was happy about that.

I made a pasta salad for dinner. It was good. I made too much pasta so I have some for tomorrow. I washed my dishes afterwards and then went back to my room. I am so hot. The kitchen was so hot. I need to cool down. I am also very tired. I didn’t sleep well last night. I got up to pee and tried to go back to sleep but couldn’t. I kept tossing and turning. I finally took an Ativan at like 5am because I couldn’t take the sleeplessness anymore. I got a headache right now. I had two cups of coffee and a glass of iced tea. I have been trying to drink more fluids but it is hard because I am not thirsty.

I am trying to avoid taking a nap. I am really tired though. Game is over so I can read tonight. I took the Latuda early because I ate enough calories for it. I had a protein drink that was 400 calories so I figure I would be safe to take it. It was really good, that protein drink. I will get another one when I go to the store again. I just wish it wasn’t so damn expensive. I think it is like $4 for a bottle. I don’t remember how many ounces it was. My cousin will take me sometime this week. I have a few protein bars left. They are ok but are tough to chew. I hate that they stopped making the protein bars that I liked. They were good.