Fourth of July

It’s the fourth of July. I don’t have any plans but to listen to the ball game. I am not feeling really good. My head is filled with paranoia and voices. Still feeling depressed. My friend has been wanting to make plans with me for a movie or something but I just am not in the mood for social activities. “I am now the most miserable man living. if what I feel were equally distributed to the whole human family, there would not be one cheerful face on the earth. Whether I shall ever be better I cannot tell; I awfully forebode I shall not. To remain as I am is impossible.; I must die or be better, it appears to me” –Abraham Lincoln.

Sox are winning right now, if this rookie pitcher doesn’t blow it.

I didn’t sleep very well. I woke up at three in the morning, fell back to sleep around four and then woke up at nine. I woke up with weird dreams. I dreamt of my godfather and my uncle. I guess they have been in the back of my mind.

I need to take a shower today and brush my teeth. I haven’t done either in the last two days. I just have not felt like it. I have not felt like doing anything. There are no buses to Davis so no Starbucks today, but I do have their refreshers. Supposedly they have caffeine in it but I hardly feel it. I do like the taste of the Lime refresher. I bought their Valencia orange and think it tastes like Tang so I don’t like it as much.

I feel like having French fries but it’s way too hot to turn the oven on. And because today is a holiday, I don’t think my favorite sub shop is open. I might make some bacon for dinner though. Would love a nice toasted sandwich with cheese.