I didn’t think I would write today. I am kind of not really in a writing mood. My writing mojo has ceased to be and I am kind of depressed about it. I posted a status about losing my writing frenzy and a person liked it. I hate the like button as it truly doesn’t reflect things. Does the person really like that I can’t write anymore? Or are they just showing support somehow through, “liking” a status. Same can be said of the blogs. How many of us have just scrolled through the reader and just hit “like” because the first few sentences were enticing. I have one blog that I follow that is just of clouds. I like this blog because some times the patterns are pretty and amazing. Other times they are not. I don’t scroll through the reader every day like I used to. Not too many of the blogs that I follow post every day so I check it every few days.
My football team lost tonight. It was a sad loss. I don’t think my team is ever going to make it to the SuperBowl again.
Tomorrow I am heading out to see my optometrist because I want his opinion on my eye situation. My psychiatrist wants me to see an ophthalmologist but I don’t have an appointment until May and I am hoping that seeing him might bring up the appointment. I think I can wait but the intervals of my eyes not focusing are getting more frequent than they were before. Either that, or I am just becoming more tired everyday. Funny how you take your eyesight for granted until something happens to it. I am not saying I am losing my eyesight but if I have to rest my eyes more because of the increased use of the computer, this is going to suck. I get anxious when I can’t read or use the computer and everything is blurry. It doesn’t happen all the time. It is worse in the morning and evening than it is during the day. I just hope when I see my eye doctor, his office doesn’t expect a copayment as I don’t have it. I hate copayments. I think they are just a nuisance.
I have been sleeping for the past few hours or so. I got really tired after the game. I hope I can go back to sleep for the night. I think I will be able to. I just took my night time meds and soon will take my pain meds as my ankle is more painful than I can stand. I don’t know why that is. I haven’t done anything at all today except watch TV. I was trying to get caught up on Major Crimes and failed short of doing that because of the game. Jeri Ryan from Voyager (Star Trek) is playing the defense attorney and she is a bitch! Love seeing her again, even if it is a bitchy role. She is one hot ticket.
Tomorrow I will need to shower and brush my teeth. Yes, these two things have to be the priority of the day. Just hope that I don’t gag when I brush. I still have to call the dentist. I am so dreading seeing them because I know I will be reprimanded for failing my dental hygiene activities. I don’t know when I stopped caring about brushing. It has been years since I have brushed consistently. I don’t mean to write this to be gross just as an observation as those suffering depression often neglect these things, depending on the severity of depression. Course my reasons for stopping to brush have more to do with nausea and gagging than for depression itself. I would always throw up while brushing in the morning so I stopped one day and really haven’t gone back to it. I will if I am not nauseous and can “get away with it” so to speak. It all has to do with timing. I got to make sure my stomach is empty or half full so I don’t throw up all its contents. So because of this, I have stopped brushing.
midnightdemons7 