I feel like today should be Saturday. This week just feels so long. I had an up and down day yesterday. I was glad my podcast went out. My friend said that it was the 2nd most listened to. I haven’t listened to the final cut yet. But if you have, please leave a comment on here. Would love to know what you thought of it.
I got into a fight with my sister. She had pots on the table for days and then started yelling at me because I was sitting in the kitchen. I don’t know where they belonged so I didn’t put them away and when I told her this she flipped out on me. Then my mother got funny after eating dinner. She became lethargic, her vision was blurred, speech was slurred, and she felt weak. My nephew got worried and called an ambulance. My mother laid down and as EMS came, she came out of it. I don’t know if she had a TIA or not. She refused to go back to the hospital as she just came home just a few hours ago. My stupid brother in law thinks it is because of the blockages in her heart. That isn’t the reason she became like she did. Otherwise she would be like that as long as her heart remained blocked.
I was just feeling like shit afterwards. I was tired but couldn’t sleep because my AC was making a high pitched noise. I think I am going to have to get a new one. I should have bought it when I had the stimulus money. It isn’t making noise now and is working pretty good. I still can only have high and low settings though. It is an old AC.
I fell asleep some how and then had woken up around 2230 to pee. It still hurts and my doc finally sent in a script for antibiotics. I haven’t gotten the report yet but maybe he did and decided to treat me. I got them today and took my first dose. I have to take it twice a day for the next seven days. I hope I will start to feel better in a few days. This pain that I am feeling all the time sucks. Peeing every couple of hours sucks more. Been a week now that this has been happening. I hate it. Just grateful I haven’t peed myself and made it to the toilet in time all the times the urges have been powerful.
I told my therapist I didn’t want to see her after she texted me with a time change for next week. She said let’s talk about it so I agreed and then I sent her a message saying that I think it is time to move on. I told my psychiatrist and supposedly he will try and find me a new therapist but I am not hopeful. I think he wants me to stick with the one I have now and I just can’t. 45 minutes/wk is not enough time for me. She wants me to go to group but I don’t find groups beneficial. I think they are a waste of time. Nothing gets done in group except whatever the agenda happens to be. It’s rarely a place where I feel I can express what I am feeling to others and get support.