Monday Blues

I woke up around 3am and have been up since. I had I think three cups of coffee. I had therapy. I wasn’t too talkative. I was just struggling to keep myself awake. We talked about my mother’s deteriorating condition. I also told her I found out my best friend’s mother has about two weeks left to live. So fucking hard. I told her my mother called me her son in the ED. I still am shocked.

Yesterday was a hard day when my mother came home from the hospital. My aunts came over and I pretty much yelled at both of them. Wasn’t anything serious. They were being stupid and I wasn’t going to have it. One of my aunts dead named me and pissed me off. She had done this several times already and I just flew off the handle. We have a new hospice company for my mother. Hopefully they will be better than the one we had.

I’ve been trying to rest most of the afternoon. I made some chicken breast for lunch. It was good. I have been feeling low all day. I have to get my meds tomorrow. It is supposed to be bad out but I just wasn’t able to go today. I didn’t feel like getting dressed and going out. I haven’t showered in a few days. It has been tough. I’ll try to shower tomorrow. I haven’t brushed my teeth today. Think I will do that before bed.

any thoughts?

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