Author: Midnight Demon

As Charlie Brown says, “Good Grief”

I am in a mood that doesn’t want to do a damn thing. I had a cup of coffee and some biscuits. Then I had therapy. I was “quiet”. I was in pain throughout the session. My arm hurts so bad. She had me take some pain meds during session. I am to try and shower and brush my teeth more. Now I just want to go to bed.

I should call the pharmacy but I am not in the fucking mood to deal with idiots today. According to the app, my blood pressure med will be ready in five days from now. Unacceptable. I have just a three day supply right now as they only gave me five pills on Friday. I am bullshit it is taking so long for this medication to be filled. I am seriously considering going to the pharmacy that will be tough to get to rather than deal with this. Just got a message from them and they will report this to their manager. I had filed a complaint Friday over this bullshit.

My chest is hurting today. I really need to put some heat on it. I just don’t want to move. I want to sleep. Or at least lay down in bed. Today is my mother’s birthday. We are having a party later for her and ordering Chinese food. I cannot wait and hope that I have an appetite by then. I also hope I feel like socializing with my family because right now I just want to stay in my room and be in bed.

Bladder is being finicky all day. I’ve been having to go every 2.5 hours or so.

I got my groceries today. I was doing fine until my elbow hit the doorknob and then I was done. I’ve been in excruciating pain since. I did my meds and tried to nap but I couldn’t get my arm comfortable.

I stink and need a shower but I can’t move my arm so it isn’t happening. I haven’t brushed my teeth either today. I keep forgetting to do it. Maybe before bedtime. I still haven’t tried the vag cream. I want to put it on when I am cleaner.

I had a weird dream where my sister had a baby and she left me in charge of taking care of it. Felt so real.

Sister is bitching again and I am trying not to take blame for it.

I am already in a bad mood and feel like taking something to go to oblivion. I really just want to die because of the pain I feel. My upper arm and shoulder hurt so fricken bad. It hurts just to hold a bottle of Gatorade. I don’t know when this pain is going to stop. Been three months already. I see the surgeon this week. My covid test is negative so that is good.

Snow has melted a little bit today. I fear the rest will turn to ice over the next few days as temps will be in the teens or below that. I don’t have to go out till Wed to see the surgeon. Wish I had PT. My ribs are still hurting from my near fall down the stairs the other day. I put heat on today but it didn’t help much.

I have therapy tomorrow morning that I just want to sleep through. I really don’t want to go.

Saturday Blog 08012022

I had my Covid test today. I had insomnia yesterday where I was up from Midnight till around 2130. I slept through the night waking up to my med alarm at 0730. I just shut it off and went back to sleep. Around 1030 I took my meds and went back to sleep as I didn’t feel like getting up. I woke up again around 1230, checked my messages and went back to sleep what I hoped to be a half hour or so but turned into two hours. I am glad I woke up because I needed to even though I wanted to stay in bed all day.

I had a bowl of cereal and then a cup of coffee. I texted my sister to see if she was still taking me and she forgot but was still going to take me. I came back to my room and read Twitter while I waited. Around 1530 I brushed my teeth and washed my face. I wanted to take a shower because I stink but I don’t have the energy.

Yesterday was quite a day for me. I was in pain with my ankle because we had a snow storm. I ordered food and as I was heading down the stairs, I almost fell. In my quick reaction I put out my left arm to keep from falling and wrenched my shoulder in the process. I was in a lot of pain. I pulled my chest muscles so my ribs hurt so much that it hurts to breathe.

I am in less pain today but I cannot hold my new glass water bottle with my sore arm. It is too heavy for it. I was able to lift a gallon of milk today for my cereal so that was good. I took some ibuprofen for the pain. If the pain doesn’t go away, I will take some BT meds for it.

I had to report my pharmacy to the main chain manager because I was so pissed my blood pressure meds took two days to get ready and then when I went to pick them up, not only was it not ready, it was out of stock. I only got five pills! Unacceptable. I had called and was told the script would be ready in like twenty minutes. Why didn’t they notify me then it was out of stock? I wouldn’t have trudged through the snow storm to pick it up if I wasn’t going to get the whole prescription. So now I got to get it hopefully on Monday.

I finally finished Medical Apartheid. I am going to hold off on reading 1619 Project. I am reading When it is darkest now. I have designated between 6-8pm as my reading hours. I want to read at least 12 books this year.

I feel really down right now because pain is between a 7 and 8, depending on where I hurt. Ankle is still flared up. Going to be cold this weekend. I just don’t want to be anymore.

I almost fell down the stairs and grabbed the handrail with my bad arm. I am in a lot of pain. Hope this kitty blep will make you smile.