Category: depression

High pollen days suck

Today the pollen count is again at a 10+. I am sneezing a lot and my sister has the damn door and windows open. My brother in law is painting the bathroom so the smell from the paint is not helping. It is low odor but still has a scent to it. I haven’t brushed my teeth yet. I probably will later or before bed. I need to use listerine because I had some food stuck in my broken tooth and it irritated my gums. I see the dentist on Wed. They are probably going to yell at me because I only brush my teeth once a day. I have been more consistent with it, which is an improvement. I haven’t showered yet. Probably tomorrow.

I was reading the Paraguayan book for my Anthro class and I had to stop mid chapter because it kept talking about how the men abused the women, raping them and “owning” them. I can only read so much about it before it bothers me. This book is terrible, I mean the reading of this stuff not necessarily of the writing. There is an article I need to read and then it is all this book. I will read it later. I just looked for it and it isn’t on the damn blackboard. Fucking fuck with this class.

My sister ordered pizza for lunch. They were going through my mother’s things. I was calling around to nursing homes to see if they took clothing donations. Most of the people weren’t there as it was Sunday. I will call tomorrow for a few more places. I wish I could take a bag and bring it to the hospital I was staying at in 2022. People often come in with just jonnies on and have no clothes to change into when they get discharged.

It’s nice out today. I read for a bit outside but the wind made it chilly. I finally slept through the night. I got up before noon as I wanted to read before the game. It’s going on now. Sox have taken the lead but there was a 1^st and 3^rd with one out situation when I last looked at the game. I love that baseball is back. It is my top favorite game. Sox win 5-4.

I have therapy tomorrow. I don’t really know what to talk about. I forget what we last talked about. I got so busy with studying I really didn’t do much for therapy stuff. I don’t remember what we talked about last week. This is why I blog about my sessions because I never remember them otherwise. Baseball and my psych class took precedent. If it wasn’t for the fact I had it in my calendar, I don’t even think I would remember what day we met. I just looked at my past blogs and I don’t think I wrote about my last session. I had to study. I know I went to reading the book after session.

I had my meds delivered but I still need to pick up one more from the pharmacy around the corner. I will pick it up tomorrow. I don’t know if I will go out or not. I have a lot of reading to do this week. I only had two slices of pizza but I am so fully even though it has been at least four hours since I last ate. I should eat something but I don’t know what. I had some cheese with my coffee earlier. I wanted some crackers but I think someone ate them.

Saturday Blog 13042024

I had a shitty sleep. My sister woke me up around 630 looking for some ibuprofen. I gave her some and then tried to sleep. I woke up again around 830 to pee and took my meds. It was too early to be up so I went back to bed. I should have gotten up. I woke up feeling so tired. I had a couple cups of coffee but I didn’t make anything to eat. I wasn’t really hungry. My book edits came in. I spent some of the afternoon going over them but for some reason, there doesn’t seem to be a lot of editing. I am just going through the document and then I will go through it again more slowly. I don’t like the format of the book and I have like three blank pages. Some of the pages just have a paragraph on it and nothing else.  I need to fix it.

I laid down about an hour before game time and I think I slept for a bit or at least snoozed. I was hungry but I didn’t really know what to make. I ended up heating up some chimichangas. It was good. My sister is installing a new vanity in the bathroom and has bathroom stuff on the kitchen table. She also took off the toilet paper holder, which I am not happy about. I guess tomorrow she will paint it.

I have been in a grumpy mood all day. I don’t really know why. Yesterday was my aunt’s birthday and she misgendered me the whole time. Then her best friend pulled me aside to show me her niece who is trans. I don’t know why she did this. Like it was a big secret or something. I just felt like a misfit most of the night. My cousin got weird on me, telling me I have a “good ass” whatever that means. I should have stayed home but I hadn’t seen my aunt in a while as she is never over the house anymore.

The other day I sprained my foot/ankle. It has been killing me. I have been taking pain meds and ibuprofen to settle it down some. I have no idea how I did it but it hurts. As long as I don’t move it, it doesn’t hurt but as soon as I bear weight, all hell breaks loose. I’m not sure if it is getting better or worse as the pain varies. I know staying off my foot completely helps. The xray was clean so that was good. I just hope it clears up without having to see an ortho doc.

I am still tired even though I snoozed for a bit. I am getting a headache. Ugh. I actually woke up with a few headaches last night. Had some weird dreams. Hope this doesn’t turn into a migraine. The migraine med has been working really well and the number of migraines I get has dropped to almost zero. Tomorrow I will read something. I am not sure if it will be Anthro or psych. I still need to finish chapter 8. Yesterday I didn’t get up till 1 and I was not in the mood to do anything. I have been waking up in a bad mood lately. Being in pain sucks.

Oh what a day

I spent the day in a town outside of Boston for most of the day. I wasn’t planning on it but as I was leaving the house, the last step on my stairs, I twisted my foot and I have been in pain since. I went to urgent care after my eye appointment. I have a sprain and will be in a boot for the next week or so. I was there for three fricken hours. I took an Uber home because I wasn’t going to take the T. I was in too much pain. I don’t know how I am going to manage going to campus tomorrow. I will worry about it then.

I should have taken my textbook with me. I could have spent the two hours waiting in the waiting room reading. I have a quiz tomorrow and I have no clue what chapter 8 is about. I tried reading last night but my brain was too foggy. I couldn’t concentrate. I am trying to go over the slides but my brain isn’t registering the words. I am fried. I will try and go over it again in the morning.

I have been sad most of the day. I have been thinking about my mother. Sometimes I don’t think about her but lately, I have been wanting to call her and see how she is. Can’t believe it has been a year.

I got two new glasses at the eye place. They will be in in a few weeks. Hopefully my sprain will be healed by then. I got dry eye so need to use drops a couple times a day. I will start that tomorrow.