whine

Feeling pretty low right now. I don’t really know why. I have been stuck in the house most of the day because my ankle has been hurting. The most I did today was order groceries. I debated going to the grocery store but I knew I wouldn’t be able to get as much stuff as I can online and I knew it would cost the same or more if I went. Guess it evens out.

I don’t know why I feel like crying. I just finished watching Hart of Dixie and I think Wade and Zoe are back together. I hope they are because they made such a good couple but who knows. I really like this show.

Been thinking about writing another paper but so far nothing has come to me about what I should write on. I know I should work on my book but I just don’t have the energy for that. Right now all I want to do is sleep. I am kind of dopey from the pain meds. I should take a shower to try and wake up but that would involve standing and I don’t want to stand too long on my sore ankle. I think part of the reason I am depressed is because it is nice out and I am stuck inside because I can’t go out because of pain. Even going up and down the stairs to my room is painful.

I am so tired of being in pain. I wish I could do something about it but there is nothing I can do except take pain meds. I really want to try and find a job but seeing as I can’t walk too long or stand too long, I really don’t know what kind of job I can do. I have worked in the lab for fourteen years and now I can’t do that anymore. I was hoping to go back to it at some point because the pay is good but I just can’t run around and walk all over the place like I used to.

I just want to do something today. I know I can go out but it will hurt me later tonight. It’s so frustrating. I just want to nap and I think that is what I am going to do…