Met with dietitian today
I woke up really late today. I got up around 2. I had my coffee and biscuits. I had like an hour before I had my appointment. I wish I didn’t sleep so late as I wanted to pick up my meds. Now I will have to go tonight or tomorrow.
I had the meeting with the dietitian and she asked what I had for each meal. It was hard because sometimes I just have one meal a day and that is all. She said that I should have something every 4-5 hours and to increase my water intake by half a liter. I am going to add some cheese to my grocery order.
My mother made flounder for dinner. It is a fish we normally don’t eat. I didn’t like it. It takes like flour. I had some red potatoes with it. It was ok.
I don’t think I will be going out. I am kind of tired. I hate when I sleep past noon as then I feel tired all day.
I met with my psychiatrist yesterday. We talked about ketamine. He is putting in the referral for it. They had some questions about past medication experiences. The first question was have I experienced psychosis. I have and I hope that isn’t going to go against me. It is controlled right now with meds. Part of me wants to stop it to see if I will be psychotic again. But I also know that if I do, the medication won’t work as well when I restart it. I hate that in this sense I am dependent on the medication. He said that he will send a message to my therapist about starting ketamine. I am a little nervous about it. If it works, it could also help my pain.
I had to go to the bathroom and after I did my business, I brushed my teeth. I am on a four day streak right now. Hope I am able to keep it up.
Sox are playing tonight against the Blue Jays. I’m half interested and half just want to sleep. I have been slowly losing interest in my Sox. Depression has just gotten so damn bad. Most days all I think about is death. There is a webinar that Jobes is putting on about futures. I think I am going to go to it. It might help the depression. Seeing Jobes always makes me happy. I look up to him so much.