Need for Affiliation
We all feel the need to affiliate, to have this connectedness to one another and to have our work validated and to be validated for who we are. When this doesn’t happen, we tend to feel alone and worthless. Over time this builds up and may lead to depression which then leads potentially to suicide.
In his lifetime work, Edwin Shniedman thinks that there are 20 needs that leads to suicide and affiliation is one of those, along with validation. I guess I have been feeling like lately my work has not had too much affiliation. I have not had too many comments like I have in the past and my readership has dwindled. I have tried to figure out why things have been bothering me so much and I think this is why. I no longer feel like I have affiliation with anyone in regards to my work. I haven’t gotten a good job or I have been through what you have been through in weeks. I know it sounds silly, but to me it means a lot. I am not saying that I am going to die because I don’t have this. It just is another reason for my unhappiness. Now that I know this I can bring it up with my therapist and come up with ways of dealing with it. Because we all have these needs, some more than others.
midnightdemons7 
It makes perfect sense to me. I’d quibble about the use of the “affiliation” in the sense of validation, but not in the sense of acceptance. I don’t think anyone else can, or should be able to, validate us. I think what is important is that we are all accepted for who and what we are, that our work is accepted for what it is and that our writings are accepted as the best we can produce at that time.
I do understand what you mean about a job as, since before Christmas, I’ve been applying for around 20 or more every week and so far no success even though I know I could do the jobs. It isn’t silly at all, in fact I think it’s perfectly understandable that after a while it gets to you. I had a discussion with my wife the other day following her comment that “I work”. I pointed out that I too work, it’s just that my work isn’t for an employer and I don’t get paid, but nevertheless I think of my job search and my attempts to gain new skills as working. I don’t know how you view your blog but to me it has the feel of something you work at: it has purpose and hopefully it brings you a level of satisfaction from writing it. Clearly from the comments I see from your readers your blog is beneficial to them so your work certainly has purpose and benefits for yourself and others. Sounds good to me.
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