Going down in Flames

Going down in Flames

Feeling depressed today, more than usual. Seems like as each day passes, I get more and more into the abyss. I have been out of the house three days this week. I am happy about that. Just wish my mood could reflect it. I went to my father’s today for my weekly visit. I am thinking of getting him a monthly pill box so I don’t have to go over every week. We’ll see. Today he asked me how long he has to take his meds. I told him forever. You would have thought I just gave him a death sentence. Idiot.

I got good news today. My psychiatrist is back in the office! I haven’t seen her since September. I am trying to set up an appointment with her but she, of course, hasn’t responded to my email yet. I hope she responds soon. I can’t wait to see her. It’s been too long.

I have had a sleepy day today. Went to bed with pain and woke up in pain. Pain meds caused me to go back to sleep. Even now, I am having a hard time bearing weight on my left foot. It started on the way home from my father’s. There has been some temperature degree changes in the last 24 hours so I am hoping that is the reason. I really can’t bear to be in physical pain while I am suffering from psychache. It is just too intolerable.

I haven’t finished typing up my short story. I really wanted to work on that today but haven’t found the time to do it. I might type up one page when I finish this blog. Depends on how I feel and what motivation I have left. Just writing this is difficult. I am being distracted by Twitter and my damn phone keeps going off with text messages. Most of these text messages are from the T, saying that buses are being delayed due to traffic. I get them every day around this time.