New Phone and Other Things

New Phone and Other Things

I finally got my new phone. I am going to cringe when I get my first bill. They told me it will be $40 more than what I am paying but I didn’t see that in my contract so we’ll see. I am very tired as I walked a long way to get the phone because I didn’t have a car to get me there. I did alright but I am sure going to be sore tomorrow. I placed the phone in the otterbox. Now I can’t get it out! The buttons don’t match up with the phone. UGH. I am going to have to take it to the store and see if they can fit it right because I don’t want to bend or break my phone! Just opening the box was a tricky thing!

I still am getting grief because I refuse to change my FB profile pic. My cousin just told me to “be happy”. FUCK YOU. Depression is what I have. I can’t be happy even if I wanted to. I rather be content but I don’t even get that at times. I am so tired of fighting this depression all the time and then having to deal with stigma, because that is what it is. If I was having a physical illness, they wouldn’t tell me to buck up or be happy. It just sucks. I really am angry at my cousin for saying that but then she is a bitch, so I have to try and take it with a grain of salt. I shut off the FB browser that I had open. I am sick of FB. I miss my game so badly and I think that is what is contributing to my depression. Sure, I play poker now and then, but I lose 20 hands to every 3 I win. It’s not fun losing.

Still rainy today, and much colder. They said the temp was going to drop over the next few days. I hope it downpours tonight so the baseball game is canceled. But since I have been out, no rain at all. It is going to be painful to watch them play if the game stays on. It just started raining! YAY!!

I have therapy today. I asked for an extra session, which is probably going to bite me in the ass but my mood sucks so it is justified. Might write another blog about it if I am up to it. I am really tired so who knows. I am planning on taking my meds early tonight. The walk that I took to the Sprint store was WAY out of my league but I did it. I am proud that I was able to do it. I just wish I could do it every day. I would love to sit at Station Landing Starbucks rather than Davis. But getting to Davis is easier than Sta. Landing. Maybe when I get up to my walking distance, I will start going there to get my walking in. It has to be at least a mile walk to the Landing. It will be good exercise for me. According to the walking tracker I have, I did almost an hour walking. I probably won’t be able to do that two days in a row, but I think I can manage now that the weather is nicer. That is if I can convince myself to leave my room every day or every other day. It will have to depend on my pain levels. Everything depends on my pain levels.