Today has been a rough day. I have been stuck inside because of the freezing temperatures outside and I just been having cabin fever. I really wanted a latte today but made a hot cocoa instead.
I have been wanting to write all day but nothing has been forming to actually write. It is so frustrating. It’s like the words are there but they just won’t come out. And having no idea what I am writing is not helping. I wanted to write a blog just about Aeschi but I need to get into that kind of mood and I am just not there.
Then I thought I would clear my bureau off with stuff I don’t need anymore but I got overwhelmed and had to stop. Plus I kept finding stuff to play with to distract me from the task so that wasn’t good. Also wanted to clean up my office a little bit but that didn’t happen. I just couldn’t get myself motivated to do it. I just have to pick up my jackets and hang them up in the closet. Not a huge deal. And junk my printers. I have decided that I am just going to throw away the printers that are useless to me. I don’t think I can the HP printer to work anyways and I don’t have the drivers for the other one. I don’t even know if it still works anymore as it hasn’t printed anything in years. I will get myself a good printer soon as I am able to afford it.
I’m feeling so shut in it’s not funny. I am going to go out tomorrow. I will take my Aeschi book and just write something. I also will get my latte that I have been wanting the last few days. I also need to go to a stationary store and get a calendar for the year. I don’t know if that will be tomorrow or not. Depends on what the streets look like. I am not going to risk falling just for a calendar.
My writing partner and I have decided not to work on our book until February. That is fine with me as I have nothing to write about. I haven’t really thought what I am going to write. I know I need to add to the six pages I already wrote but I don’t know if I can add to it. The pages seem more like an introduction type and I don’t want to mess with it.
I requested a song today by my favorite DJ and she never played it. Now I am debating downloading the song because even though I have it (it’s in .WMA format), I can’t convert it to MP3 because of licensing rights. It sucks because the whole album is that way. I should have transferred it to CD when I had the chance. I am excited that my favorite artist, Terri Clark, is coming out with a new album in Feb. And my other favorite artist comes out in two weeks. I already pre-ordered her CD. Hers I have to order a CD because I know the instrumentals are not going to be good for MP3 playing.
I need to get back to my routine of leaving the house every day and getting to Starbucks to write or read or to do something! Even if I spend an hour or two there I think that will be better than spending 24 hours in my house. I will have to get out of my house next Friday because of a doctor’s appointment. But other than that, I don’t have any plans of leaving the house and because of the cold, I have been hibernating more. I know part of it is because I don’t want a flare up of pain. The other part is no motivation or energy to go out. Starbucks has lost its appeal to me. I have drank every drink they have and nothing really sticks. I create my own lattes or just have their Clover coffee. Right now they have a Mexican coffee I have been dying to try. But there is no information about it so I am afraid that it will be too bold. I like coffees that are mild, strong, but mild. And because of the anhedonia, I don’t enjoy anything anymore. I guess that is why I am afraid to try this new coffee. I am afraid it will just taste flat. I will be so disappointed. I am waiting for the anhedonia to lift before trying it. Though it doesn’t see like it is going to lift anytime soon.
midnightdemons7 