Aggravated

Aggravated

Last night I heard the beep-bloop of the TiVo indicating to me that my show was being canceled. I thought it was a mistake because I know my mother wouldn’t cancel one of my shows. She usually goes to bed around eight and the show was recording at eight. Found out today that she did fucking cancel the recording and my Bones episode didn’t get recorded. I am beyond pissed. After dealing with my mother yesterday morning, her waking me up from a sound sleep, she had the audacity to tell me today that I am sleeping too much. WTF. I can’t take living with my mother anymore. She is driving me nuts with the TV being loud. I cannot believe she told me that. SHE has no idea what my sleep has been like lately. And I got practically no sleep the night before so of course I slept most of the day yesterday. It just pisses me off to no end because she is just a bitch. She doesn’t think she is one but she is. And she is so inconsiderate. Like when she says jump I am supposed to say how high. Fuck that. She asks me to do anything, it’s not happening. My monthly payment to her is going to be lower this month because fuck her. I pay the cable bill. I am behind on it anyway so I can justify not paying her half my check.

I was in therapy today and we talked about my writing. She wants me to continue writing my connection piece and she thinks my “write the pain” blog should be included in the book. UM, I don’t think so. The book has nothing to do with pain. Sometimes my therapist is a loony tune. I swear we spent the majority of the session on my writing and my book. Still no word from the editor on when she will be working on it. I swear when she tells me she is, I am going to be popping Ativan every hour. I am going to be a wreck. The editor has been having some problems so I think there is going to be more of a delay. But if she doesn’t get back to me by the end of the month, I swear I am going to ask for a refund. I will take my business somewhere else. I can’t be waiting forever.

I went to the post office today and then went to my sub shop for a couple of slices of pizza. Now I am hungry again and I want a burger. Think I will just make a bowl of cereal. I know I am hungry because I didn’t have my usual breakfast of a fried egg and toast. I could make that for my dinner tonight. Trouble is, my ankle is still bothering me so standing for any length of time hurts. I just walked to the sub shop and when I came home I was hurting. I don’t have a car. I wish I did. I would take it to my other sub shop to get my burger. But then I don’t need the headache of car and insurance payments.

I told my therapist today that I hope to see her in person next week. I am planning on taking my sister’s car and making the trek to her office. I hope that I can take my sister’s car that day. I need the car this week to take my father to his fricken blood draw. He doesn’t know this yet but I will call him tomorrow and tell him. I just hope it doesn’t snow that day. It will suck and I hate driving in that muck.