I am so stressed out that I don’t know what to do. My mother is in the hospital and will be coming home shortly. My father doesn’t like being in the nursing home so my sister is trying to get him out. My phone has been ringing all day. I feel like hiding. I don’t know if they will need a health care proxy to get him out of the nursing home. I am stressing that I will have to trek all the way there.
I talked with my psychiatrist today which was good. She agreed that I am under a lot of stress between both parents. I was also talking with my therapist but then got cut off. My stupid phone lost signal.
I am just in a deep depression where all I want to do is sleep and be left alone. I did eat today and a neighbor brought some food over so I will be having that tonight. I was going to order a pastrami sandwich but I really don’t feel like leaving the house. I still have a bucket of vomit that needs to be cleaned before my mother gets home from the hospital. Every time I think of it, I want to vomit. I have been thinking of ways to clean it. I figure if I throw some hot water in it and dilute it some, I can throw it in the toilet and then clean the bucket. But I don’t want to do anything right now. I just want to sleep.
It’s so hard writing today. My thoughts are slow again. I feel bad for my sister who has to shuffle around between the places to go to my father’s place and then to the hospital where my mother is. I am glad I don’t have a car or I would be the one shuffling all over the place.