I am babysitting my niece because she is sick. I told her I am planning on making malted chocolate chip cookies and she looked at me funny. She never has seen me bake before. I still am undecided as to which kind of chocolate chips to use for baking these cookies. I might make two batches. One batch, I plan on substituting ½ cup of oatmeal for flour. I think it will come out good, least I am hoping it will. I have been watching my niece since early this morning and just had my second cup of coffee. I can’t be sleeping on the job. She is 9 and can do her own thing, but I still need to keep an eye and ear out for her.
Soon as her mother comes home, I am taking a long, hot shower. I am cold and stinky as I didn’t take one yesterday like I wanted to. I fell asleep soon after I published my blog and didn’t wake up till around midnight. I stayed up for a few hours until my meds knocked me out again. I didn’t mean to sleep so soundly but it just happened. I think if I had taken the alarm off for my meds I probably would have skipped my meds and slept through the night, possibly.
I emailed my psychiatrist this morning to tell her I am feeling less paranoid than I was last week and that I am feeling a little bit better. She wants me to keep her informed, so hence the email. I think the increase in the trilafon has helped me. I no longer feel like people are watching me all the time. And my stress levels have been down, though they will be up again tomorrow when I see my father. He better be satisfied with what I give him and not complain like he did last year. Otherwise, it will be the last birthday gift he ever gets from me.
I was talking with a friend today. His birthday was yesterday. I totally forgot to call him so I am glad he called me today. He wants to have a get together with my friends that are south of Boston. The plan is to meet up on the 8th of April. I just hope that my leg pain is still nil and that I can walk without pain. He also wants to go to the Museum of Science because they have a Maya exhibit. I am a Maya freak. I have studied them while I was in college and find them fascinating. It will be interesting to see this exhibit. I have to find out if my sister is still a member of the museum so I can get in for free.
I have been reading more of the “Idiot” while I have been babysitting. I find the story interesting and I am wondering if I can write like Fyodor. I am totally in love with his style of writing. I just don’t think I can write fiction like he can. I am still thinking of writing up my story of the delusions but changing the names of the Goa’uld to something else so I don’t get in trouble for copyright issues. I think it will make a good short story. I will also have to change ISIS to something else. I am sure my brain can come up with something.
My sister went to the funeral today. It was sad and a lot of people went. I am not surprised. I have seen young peoples wakes and funerals be very long as they know a lot of people. My friend Danielle’s wake was like that. I must have been in line for at least a half hour before I even entered the room she was in. I was thankful the casket was closed because I would have lost it. I still feel the pain of her loss. We weren’t close as we lost touch over the years but we were good friends in high school. She died last year at the age of 37 from complications due to diabetes. Our whole class was heartbroken.
I think later today I am going to work on my psychosis story now that I have the brain power to do so. I just have to input the corrections I made while editing the story. It is cold out today so I don’t think I will be going out, especially after I had two cups of coffee at home. I am going to be wired for the day so need to focus my energy on something productive, like my writing. Maybe I can add the delusional thinking to the psychosis story and I don’t have to create a new document. There is an idea!! And with me adding to the story, it will be longer than three pages! Sweet.
One of my blogger friends posted a “get to know me” blog but it had over 100 questions. I don’t have the patience to answer over 100 questions. The last “get to know me” blog, I wanted it to be over after the 10th question. I might do it though, but now right now. I am still too paranoid to be putting myself out there.
I am still sad that my game is coming to an end. I have lost the will power to play but continue to play for those players that, like me, will be playing till the end. I have over 900 friends on FB, most of those are my gaming friends. Eventually I will weed them out. I already have deleted some that are annoying and are blaming Zynga for stupid shit. I understand they are upset but why attack someone that is not going to be paying attention to what you are fucking writing! Makes no sense.
I have started a new food shopping list on my phone so I remember what I have to buy for my cookies and for the month. Tomorrow I will have my sister’s car and I hope my LTD payment comes in so I can do the shopping. Otherwise, I am going to have to wait until possibly Thursday. I was thinking about getting the Galaxy S5 with this payment but I might wait until the S6 comes out. I will know then that the price of the S5 will go down. Only trouble is, they are being cryptic with the release date! Pisses me off when they just send you an email saying be on the look out and not give you a time frame for something. For all I know, it could be three months from now before the phone becomes available. I won’t be getting it, just want to know when the price will drop for the lower model. I am going to assume that the S4 will become free and the S5 will be $99. Least I am hoping this because right now it’s $200, even with my upgrade discount. And the only reason I am considering getting a new phone is because my phone keeps crashing apps, even if they are not in use! For example, my Walgreens app was crashing and I hadn’t used it in a few weeks. And now my contracts crashes after I look up a contact. It’s bad because sometimes I cannot close the crash report window in order to end a call. Just fucking stupid. But then I have had the same phone for almost three years. There is a new Nexus available but it’s like a tablet. I can’t imagine talking on the phone with something that big, not unless I was using a headset. The price for that phone is the same as the S5 so there is that. I just want to see it and play with it first to see if I like it. Unfortunately, when I was at the Sprint store, the model was “dead”, meaning it was a display model and not a “live” model like some of the other stores have. I actually prefer to go to the store in Brookline as I like their customer service better. I have always gone there with my phone issues and upgrades. But, we’ll see. I will wait for the S6 to come out before getting the S5. I just hope my current phone can endure the wait.
midnightdemons7 