Random 124

I got a text from Walgreens saying that my prescription was ready. It was the Zoloft that I put in last week. I had received a mail order that my doc mistakenly put in so now I have more than a month’s supply of 50 mg. If I want to go up when I see my doc in two weeks, I can do that. There is a difference in color between the mail order pills and Walgreens. I have a light color green and a dark color green. Just hope they work.

After I picked up my script, I decided to have another pastrami and cheese sub from the good sub place. It was better today than it was yesterday. I had breakfast this morning. So now I just need to have dinner and I will be okay. I think the not eating was really playing with my mood because I feel a little better with something in my stomach. I am not saying the depression has gone away but my mood is a little lighter.

While I was at the sub shop, my cousin came in and we talked for a little while. He was trying to get me to write for news papers and such. That really isn’t my thing. I rather just work on my book. I don’t understand why my family pushes me to have a job when I am disabled. I would love to work but I just can’t right now. I am in too much pain and that is just walking around the block to Walgreens and the sub place. I have been walking more but I pay the price and no one really knows this except the blog and Twitter world.

I feel downhearted after talking with him. Even now I am hurting with my ankle flaring up for just the little walking that I did. It really makes me sad that I could have been done with college if I just didn’t have a psychotic breakdown. And now that college is so expensive, there is no way for me to go back and finish my degree.

Last night was rough. I was in a lot of pain and then when I took something for the pain, it increased. It was a tough night to get through. It’s very tiring to deal with pain. I slept until 1230 and that almost never happens. I had woken up around 8 to have breakfast and then I went back to sleep. Now I am in pain again and I just want to give up. I am just so sick of being in pain all the time, every single day. And no one gets it.