Dark Hot Chocolate and Other Things

Dark Hot Chocolate and Other Things

I had bought dark hot chocolate mix and tried it out today. Because I was using more than 8 OZ of milk, I decided to use two packs of mix. HUGE mistake. It was so rich and creamy that could barely taste the chocolate. Note for next time: just use one package!

I slept fairly well. I had a rough start. After my last blog, I fell asleep only to wake up two hours later. I was rearing to go and couldn’t settle down again. I think around 0300 I finally went back to sleep. I slept around five straight hours and felt good. I made some breakfast, which was just biscuits. I was planning on making them with a burger but didn’t. Now after the hot chocolate, I don’t want anymore food.

I need to fill my meds for the week. I dread doing it. It doesn’t really take that long but it’s just that I hate doing it. I should get a month pill pack so I don’t have to worry about it but my fear is that I won’t know when it’s time to refill my meds until I go to fill the boxes again.

A friend of mine from BPD chat had a poll about whether knowing your diagnosis helped you or not. I found out that I was bipolar II last year. All this time before then, I thought I just had recurrent major depression. I can’t say that I am surprised at being Bipolar, but it was kind of a shock to see it in black and white. I don’t get the hypos frequently enough so I was thinking I just had major depression. According to the criteria, just one hypo episode slaps you with bipolar II. Knowing that I have bipolar has been a little easier to accept what my condition is and to live a little better with it. But the depressions are brutal. There is no denying that.

I still am having back and thigh pain. I haven’t made a decision about what to do about it. I could be in the early stages and that is when you want to catch CES. You catch it while it’s doing damage and the outcome is not as favorable. I really don’t want to be facing surgery. And I don’t know, with my insurance, if I will get a board certified surgeon or not. The whole thing is making me very nervous. Question is, should I wait till I see my doc the following Wednesday or call tomorrow to see him?

About G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about
This entry was posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, cauda equina syndrome, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Dark Hot Chocolate and Other Things

  1. 1. What kind of hot chocolate do you buy? We made hot chocolate from one of those gift sets. It was awful and no one could finish them. I long for a really good hot chocolate!

    2. I have used the month pill organizer with Jessie and had exactly that issue with getting the rx refilled on time. The week one is more work, but you won’t miss a refill that way for sure!

    3. Call your doc!!

  2. manyofus1980 says:

    Did you see the doc? I hope it isnt bad! I never had dark hot chocolate. Sounds good but is it bitter? XX

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