Random 655

I got off the phone with my sister earlier today. She said that my mother ordered a fridge that was 67 inches. Our current fridge is 65. I don’t think it’s going to fit. And I am not going to be moving stuff out of the freezer tomorrow because I will be too exhausted to go to my father’s appointment. It’s supposed to snow again tomorrow and on and off most of the week. Just great. I hope my ankle doesn’t flare up.

I have been eating since I got up. I think I am ready to bust because I had two bowls of my brother-in-law’s chili. It was that good. I had two turkey bacon sandwiches for lunch and then the chili. I think that will be all today.

Last night, a song that has meaning for a friend of mine came on my MP3 player. I had to email her to tell her that I was thinking about her. I didn’t write more than I was thinking of her. She wrote back saying there was a lot going on in her life but she still thought about me. I really wanted to tell her that she was no longer my contact person for emergencies anymore. She just isn’t reliable when I am having a hard time. I found someone else.

I was expecting to feel something today but it’s just another day. I don’t feel any different. My pain levels are minimal today, though I did a lot of stair walking. I had to babysit so I had to go from my apartment to the first floor. Then my niece needed the wifi password so that was another trip up and down stairs. I was going to go out today but I don’t think I will. I am too full and I am getting sleepy. I know it’s nice today but I just can’t muster the energy to get dressed. I wish I could go out in my PJs. I still need to shower, which I plan to do sometime tonight. I won’t be watching the SuperBowl. I just am not interested in it.

Ankle just started hurting so I think I will take my nap now. I need to lie down.

Published by

G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about. also writing about my daily struggle with chronic pain and how it affects my suicidality

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