Aftermath of the Election
I woke up early this morning to use the bathroom and then I checked Facebook to see who won the election. To my horror, the bigot won. Then one of my childhood friends was very happy about it. I sent him a message saying that he was basically homophobic and racist and then I deleted him from being my “friend”. I don’t regret having done this.
I am worried what the next four years are going to entail. I wonder how suicide prevention is going to work now that we don’t have a democrat in the office and the whole senate and congress is republican now. More closely, I worry about how the LBGT community is going be over the next four years. I am really hoping that this misogynist gets arrested or impeached within the first six months of office, before he can do real damage to this country. That’s not to say that in six months time damage might already have occurred but it might be fixable.
I fear those that have Obamacare right now because I think that is going to be the first thing to go in this dictatorship. Healthcare will now become a joke. But Colorado now has assisted suicide so maybe there will be an influx of people moving there to end their suffering. My state has passed a law that legalizes the use of recreational MJ. Now I fear that every Zipcar I reserve will be filled with that god awful smell.
These are my thoughts that I have this morning and I am sure there will be others. I’m going back to bed because my ankle is screaming at me and my pain meds are making me tired.
I write the date as the European way because I think it is much better than the “American” way. I have been battling a migraine for the past few hours and it finally has let up. I am wondering what to write in this blog so I’ll just run through my activities for the day. I picked up my niece from school and then watch iCarly and Spongebob. I have to say that these shows have grown on me but more so because I think Sam is a hot shit and wicked funny. Spongebob is just too stupid to be funny but I watch it anyways because it makes me laugh sometimes at the stupidity of it all.
I then began a synopsis of the long ass article of escape from self by Baumeister. I will be talking about this for the next few blogs as it is important for me to vent out. He writes about suicide attempts and the need to escape and I agree with his idea of the escape theory. High expectations of self that lead to either minor or major failures will always lead to suicide attempt or worse completed suicide. There is no real predictive model for this. The high functioning adults will not seek help because they feel it is beneath them or they just think they are too smart to be In therapy.
What gets me with this article is that it is right on the money in every respect that I have always felt when feeling suicidal. I want to escape from myself because I just feel like a failure. My deconstructed self has no where else to go but to oblivion.
Writing this out has helped me understand more about what he is saying and putting it in layman’s terms will help others I am sure of it. I know it will boost my attempt paper once I ever go back to it.
After writing and watching idiotic shows, I read some of the American revolution. This book is taking me forever and I don’t think that George Washington is ever going to make an appearance in this book though the author seems to think so. We are at the battle of Breed’s Hill (though historians have called it Bunker Hill, which is inaccurate apparently) in Charlestown and Howe has just ordered another assault on the rebels. I think it is still hysterical that the English people think this was all just a rebellion and the American people were found on radicalism. Wish I could say the same today but I don’t know what American stands for anymore. It has suffered more with the loss of economy and now the presidential election has two morons worse than the other. It is difficult to see who is going to win but if Congress is republican, most likely we will get a republican president because after all congress does run this country not the president as much as he likes to think he does. If calling for the budget is any indication, course after my cousin’s email about the falsehoods of the electoral commercials, I am not so sure which way to vote now. DO I want change or do I want things to be the same for the next four years,…I am not a political person so I may have no idea what I am talking about and I am ok with that. If you are not then I suggest you leave the blog but then this isn’t about politics. It’s just that all the word on twitter tonight was the DNC and so I had to write a little about this because it’s on my mind. I am worried about where my country is headed. I don’t know what will happen I just know I am fearful of what will happen and I guess that is where my suicidal feelings come in. if I don’t like the way the election pans out I can always kill myself because it is my right as a human being and no one can tell me otherwise. As long as America is a free country, I think that is my belief that if I don’t like who is elected after I voted for someone, I think it is my right to die because I know the next four years will be hell and I’m not going to like it so why should I live through it??