Coffee Commentary

I started writing again which is good for me. I have been compiling a paper that will incorporate psychological pain assessments (paper to be published soon!) and compare them with one another. It started off as a paper for a friend that needed to do research and has blossomed into something more now that she no longer needs my help.
I am excited about writing a paper again. I will try and not make it a novel but there are no promises. Sometimes I can get really wordy as most academicians do. I miss being in school and think that I will be able to get back to school maybe by next fall, as long as I don’t have another psychotic break between now and then. I can’t handle being psychotic and delusional thinking on top of my depression. I know lately I have been more psychotic than usual because songs have been playing in my head. I also know many people hear songs in their head but have you ever had the music stop playing and wonder why your headphones stopped working?? The music sounds like there are headphones in my ears but there isn’t! It is especially prominent when a song is stuck in my head. It plays for the entire day over and over and over like a broken radio. The only way to drown it out is to tune in to the radio or actually play my headphones. I guess you can say that the radio is talking to me even if it isn’t. Another symptom of being insane!
I have tried to get out of the house the past few days but I have been unsuccessful. Today was the first time in three days that I left the house. I have been becoming a hermit lately. I just don’t find the motivation to get my one cup of coffee. My mood has been so bleak that I just can’t be bothered to leave the house for an hour for the simple pleasure of coffee/espresso. But today I wanted a macchiato and because my drink is now a few years old, they gave me a black and white mocha instead of a macchiato. Two different tastes as the espresso is poured on the top with a macchiato and with a mocha, the espresso is on the bottom mixed with the syrup. It was still good just not what I expected. Tomorrow when I go out I will probably get an iced Hawaii Ka’u. This coffee is excellent. It takes some getting used to because it does have a weird aftertaste to it but other than that it is a very well bodied coffee with earthy tones to it.
My other favorite iced coffee is the Blue Java from Indonesia. It is by far my favorite and tomorrow I will be picking up an expensive 8 oz. I have to make this coffee at home as my Galapagos is dwindling. I still have my tribute that I have frozen and it will remain frozen as it is such an awesome coffee and they don’t make it anymore, like my Galapagos. These coffees are the Starbucks Reserve that are made specifically for the clover. I have been thinking about getting their new machine, Verissimo but then I really will not leave my house for coffee, or for anything other than doctor’s appointments or when I have to deal with my father.