Random 945

I have been sleeping on and off today. Pain has been the main contributor. I had a small breakfast and then went back to sleep. When I got up, I had lunch. My sister said she had salad so I had that and a couple slices of pizza. For dinner, I think I will just have a small bowl of cereal. I really don’t want anything else.

My mood sucks because of the pain. It’s quiet now but I just went up and down the stairs a couple of times so I know it will kick back up soon. I got to set my alarm for tomorrow morning and take a shower sometime tonight. I was going to take it this morning before the pain meds kicked in but the pain was just too much for me to stand for twenty or so minutes. It’s cold in the house so I might take one when it’s a little warmer or when the heat comes on.

I haven’t read anything today. I have been too sleepy to concentrate. Soon as I wake up a little, I will probably read Dostoevsky. I need a break from the psychology book. My therapist wasn’t in the office today because of the holiday. I wanted to see if I could see her but I guess not. Kind of sucks because I really wanted to talk to her. I feel like it’s been ages since I spoke to her and it’s almost been a week. But I am glad we are talking tomorrow.

Tomorrow is going to be tough. I have back to back to back appointments between myself and my father. That is why I am trying to take it easy today and stay off my foot as much as possible. I don’t want my foot to flare up like it did last night otherwise I won’t be able to wake up early tomorrow. I figure I got to leave the house by 0815 so I can be at the Square by 0845. That should leave me some time to get my coffee and then go to my appointment. I haven’t decided if I am going to bring my backpack. Probably not because I don’t see myself writing in my journal at all. I really don’t want to go to my father’s appointment but I have to be there. I just hope the surgeon calls in the morning, before my appointments. But my luck, he will call during and then I will miss his call. I hope he leaves me a message saying what he thinks and we don’t play phone tag.

About G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about. also writing about my daily struggle with chronic pain and how it affects my suicidality
This entry was posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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