random 965

Random 965

I didn’t do much of anything today. I barely left my room except to use the bathroom. Last night I brought up some protein bars so I have been eating that. Other than that, I haven’t really felt hungry. I am in a lot of pain.

Around two hours ago I texted my therapist to have a check in. I haven’t heard back, yet. We’ll see if she does, but I highly doubt it. She still has not given me a time to meet and I am losing my patience.

I still am in a bad mood and my friend that I am upset with is now saying she hasn’t done anything wrong. I could write a whole blog about how pissed I am about her but I won’t. I’m just not going to talk to her until I can be civil. I hate it when people say things like they shouldn’t feel this way or that because they have every damn right to feel what ever it is they are feeling.

My mother is fighting with the phone company. Apparently she cannot dial out one number on her phone so she is going to have them fix it. I have a feeling when the tech was here a couple weeks ago, he fucked something up. But what do I know.

I feel wicked cold because I haven’t slept. I took a couple of pain meds and Ativan and I still haven’t passed out. I want my pain to be gone! I am getting dangerously close to feeling like doing something. I don’t care what that something is if it will bring me relief.

The weather has not been helpful. Wind and rain has been bad. I think it finally stopped now. I don’t know what the fuck I did to my left hip but it’s killing me. I have been in bed all day and when I turned to move, it didn’t like it. I am not in a good mood.

About G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about. also writing about my daily struggle with chronic pain and how it affects my suicidality
This entry was posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to random 965

  1. manyofus1980 says:

    its very windy here too. it kept me awake last night. i’m sorry the pain is bad again. sending you hugs if you need one. xxx

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