moon went hiding, stars quit shining

Moon went hiding, stars quit shining

My new favorite song is called Hurricane by Luke Combs. I have been listening to it for most of the evening. I have been trying to distract myself from the pain in my ankle but nothing seems to help it. I just had a bowl of cereal, some granola mixed in with cocoa pebbles. It was good. After I ate, I shaved my head. I wasn’t going to but I decided to do it because I felt frisky. HEHEHE

My friend texted me and we texted for an hour or two before my meds kicked in. I fell asleep until around 0930 or so. I went to the bathroom and saw that my mother made bacon. She left me some so I ate that. Then I went back to sleep until my ankle woke me up, screaming in pain. It was a little after 12, more than 12 hours since my last pain med dose. I got up to take a pain pill and wanted a burrito. A new Mexican place had mailed out their menu and I wanted to try their burritos. Only problem was they didn’t open till 1700. So I went on Grubhub and found a place down the street from me. There are a ton of Mexican places that end of Broadway. Soon as the delivery came, my cousin called me, saying my mother had groceries. FUCK. That meant going up and down stairs. Asshole can’t be bothered with that. I had a couple bites of the burrito and then went downstairs.

There were only a few bags. I finished eating. The burrito was good, though they didn’t give me the sour cream I requested. I had some of their chips and guac, which was good. I also ordered a cake and it was good, though I don’t think I will order it again. The cake was kind of dry, even though there was condensed milk on it. I didn’t care for it.

I had to go to Walgreens to pick up a photo and my prescription. I waited as I was sweating in the kitchen as I had my lunch. I cooled off some and then was getting lazy so decided to leave before I got too lazy. The stupid app refilled another prescription, including the one that I needed/requested. I hate this feature and I don’t know how to undo it. I got some bandaids as my mother needed the ones that I have and my photo.

I came home and I was really sweating. I didn’t feel like showering so I just put cold water on my face and neck. It helped cool me down some. My things from Amazon came. I had ordered a Moleskin notebook and it was smaller than I thought it would be. I should have read the dimensions before buying it. But I still can use it.

I’m still thinking about going into the hospital tomorrow. I’ll decide in the morning, if I don’t wake up in pain.

About G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about. also writing about my daily struggle with chronic pain and how it affects my suicidality
This entry was posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to moon went hiding, stars quit shining

  1. manyofus1980 says:

    I hope you’ll be ok and in no pain or little pain tonight. I am thinking of you and sending hugs. xx

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