document 4

Document 4

I keep forgetting to close Word when I finish a document so now I am up to “Document 4”. Seemed to be a fitting title so I used it. I am wicked excited for baseball tonight. I have 8 hours until the Sox play Cleveland. Pretty Ricky is playing on the mound so it should be a good game. My mother is making my favorite, chicken cacciatore. It smells so damn good.

I got a call from the psych intake. I have an appointment with the CBT person, in fucking Nov!! WTF seriously?? I guess it’s better than December, but still. And it’s not at MGH but a satellite office near Government Center. Wonderful. I will have to switch train lines to get to where I am going seeing as I can’t walk down the street anymore. It will be nice to see the new Govt center station though. It is nice inside but I haven’t seen the outside. Maybe I will post some pics when I go.

Back is still hurting so I decided to make coffee. I also had a little breakfast as I was kind of hungry. I wanted to have the cherry breakfast bars but I couldn’t find them so I had the mixed berry kind. It was still good. I need to shower today and I don’t know how it’s going to go because I can barely stand for more than a few minutes. I have been trying to stretch out my lower back but it hurts more to do the exercises.

I think part of the reason my back is flared up today is because I am constipated. I just went and some of my back pain dissipated. I wish I could control the constipation better but the strong pain meds always bangs me up real good. I am surprised I went today. I am glad I did because the pain was getting really bad. I won’t be going out today because I made my coffee but I might step outside for a little bit. I really need to find out what the hell all the banging is about. It’s driving me nuts. Someone that is over the street next to me is doing some kind of construction and it is loud!

I am feeling kind of down today. I have the “do nothings”, though I really should be doing something. I really need to wash my bedding but that is going to take some work because I need to clear off my bed with all the shit on it, including my “office”. And doing it with an injured back is not a good idea. Maybe I can do it over the weekend, provided I don’t have any set backs with my back hurting me.

I need to go out tomorrow for my NP appointment. I hope that I can make it in one piece. I won’t be able to wear my brace as that will just annoy my back further. I will take my cane with me just in case my foot decides to not work anymore. I am nervous about meeting some one new that doesn’t know my situation. I just hope I don’t have to pee in a cup.

About G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about. also writing about my daily struggle with chronic pain and how it affects my suicidality
This entry was posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to document 4

  1. Paper Doll says:

    “I just hope I don’t have to pee in a cup” – ain’t that the truth. Good luck.

  2. manyofus1980 says:

    good Luck for tomorrow I’ll be thinking of you. XXX

any thoughts?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s