A Grumpy Painful Monday

A grumpy painful Monday

I woke up a few times during the night. My ankle was not letting up any, so with the passing hours, I just took more pain meds. I have been in bed all day. I managed to brush my teeth when I went to the bathroom this morning. That has been the extent of my activities today. I haven’t eaten anything because I just am not hungry. I just want to be left alone and sleep. My mother called me twice. The first time I let it go to voicemail. I had to pick up the second time or she would come to my room and I didn’t want her to. She has a hard time getting up the stairs. She wanted me to have dinner but I told her I wasn’t hungry. She made dinner anyway and when it was finished, she called me. I still didn’t change my mind. The only thing I want to eat is my pumpkin cake and maybe a protein shake.

I am in a really grumpy mood because I shouldn’t be in pain. I have done everything to control the pain but I still continue to hurt. It’s not severe pain but just an annoying pain. The depression that I feel doesn’t want to make me get out of bed. I feel bad. One of my friends tried talking to me yesterday and I ignored her messages. Today she tried again and I just told her bluntly, I wasn’t in the mood to talk. I was in pain and I just wanted to hibernate. She understood. I told her when I felt up to it, I would be in contact with her again.

I need a shower. But I don’t feel like taking one. I also haven’t moved my bowels. Now we are getting to the danger zone because the last time I went was last Wednesday. I know that is partly why I have no appetite. I have been taking fiber pills but not moving around any isn’t helping either. I emailed my psych about this and haven’t heard back from her.

I wanted to do a few errands today but that didn’t happen. I still have my prescription at the pharmacy I haven’t picked up yet. I also wanted to get a burrito. Guess that will have to wait till tomorrow. I never called the dentist either and it’s too late now. I am just so wiped out from being in pain the last few days that I just don’t want to do a damn thing. I just want to keep popping pills until I get relief but that isn’t going to work. Be great if it did, but I doubt it would.

I wanted to drop off the last piece of pumpkin cake to my psychiatrist today. Now that piece is going in my belly not hers. Oh well. I will make the cake again as it is a favorite of mine. I have to place a grocery order in soon. I won’t order that much stuff because I will be dieting, starting next week. I haven’t told my mother yet but I will sometime this week. I think she won’t like it but I don’t care. I just want to see if I can do it.

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