Sunday blog 25

Sunday Blog 25

I woke up late with my app for my medications beeping. I thought it wasn’t so late as the thing was set to go off at 0815. It was 1115. Oops! I was late in taking my blood pressure pills. I took them and then went downstairs to take a shower. My mother was in the bathroom so I had to wait. I thought about what I was going to do today but nothing came to mind. I thought it was going to be snowing most of the day but it wasn’t and even the sun came out later in the afternoon.

I made coffee and a sandwich after my shower, which went without incident. I wasn’t feeling too much pain at this point so I didn’t take any pain meds. I brought my coffee up to my room and read Twitter and Facebook. I found a tweet about a free coloring book and got the link to save the PDF. I then tried printing it but it wouldn’t print for some reason. I tried different settings and no go. I then was worried something was wrong with my printer so I randomly printed something. It printed just fine. I just couldn’t get the damn coloring book to print. I am going to have to look into it. I might have to adjust the settings a special way or something. It would be neat to have this coloring pages as it is a stress relaxer.

About two hours later, I got hungry again. My mother made a turnip and stunk up the house. It killed my appetite for the time being. My mother was going to make a pasta dish but not one that I really like so I decided to order a burger and onion rings. I waited over an hour for my food and they were skimpy on the rings, again! This time I was going to complain. I usually don’t because I don’t like confrontations. But I paid for the onion rings and I wanted my money’s worth. The manager told me that they weigh the rings and that was why I got so few. What ever. Next time I am going to order them separately so they don’t come with the burger. I really like this place and would seriously hate to stop ordering from them because they are skimpy with the rings. The manager said he was going to tell the owner, and I hope he does because otherwise, they will lose a customer.

I went on to BPD Chat. It was a good chat tonight, talking about emotions. I kind of felt like it wasn’t for me because the intense emotions of BPD (borderline personality disorder) I don’t usually feel. The only intense feelings I get are suicidal ones or panic when I am triggered by pain and PTSD. I know most people with BPD also have PTSD but that isn’t always the case.

Before I ordered my food, my ankle was saying hi to me. Then my toes were. Then both my ankle and toes were. I felt I had to order something quick before I became incapacitated to go down the stairs for delivery. I still am hurting but it’s not so bad because I took my pain meds at the start of it. Now I am just dealing with remnants of pain. I don’t have anything to do except read my book. I need to finish the chapter I am on. I hate being in the middle of a chapter without a clear break in the text.

I don’t have any appointments this week. I do have to go to my PCP to pick up a script. I am hoping to do that Wednesday when my check comes in. I also plan on getting a haircut. I will go earlier in the day so I am not waiting so long. Tomorrow I got to call a therapist and see if he will take me. He is in my town, down the road from me, very accessible by bus. I hope he works out otherwise I am going to have to call this care center place that is not so easy to get to. I would have to take two buses to get there because I can no longer walk down one end of the street all the way to the end. I used to walk it all the time when I was younger way before chronic pain entered my life. Now I am lucky to walk a few blocks without pain and that is on a good day.

About G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about. also writing about my daily struggle with chronic pain and how it affects my suicidality
This entry was posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Sunday blog 25

  1. manyofus1980 says:

    happy you don’t have too much of a stressful week. hopefully your sleeping now. I took a sleep pill last night and now I feel all groggy ug xxx

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