Midnightdemon Blog 27 July 2017

Midnightdemon Blog 27 July 2017

I woke up a little after 0130 in pain. It felt like someone was grabbing my foot and trying to squeeze the crap out of it. I took some more Neurontin and my pain meds. I was able to talk with a couple members of the CRPS group on Facebook. It was nice that I was being heard and understood. I don’t know why my pain is so bad these days. It doesn’t seem to take much for it to set it off. I swear when I took off my sock on my bad foot, it set it off.

I think I finally did the ordering for my upgrade and the additional line. The customer service order department wiped out the order and the phone that I received, I have to return. Seems kind of silly that I need to return the new phone to get a new phone. But whatever. As long as I don’t have to pay for three phones a month, I will be happy. Right now, the cancellation hasn’t gone through as the woman said my bill will be $400 until my return is processed. She is sending me the return kit. Right now because I had to do two orders, my account has a negative balance from the payments. It was so tiring to be on the phone with them. I swear it was all afternoon as I was just put on hold for most of the time. I hope the issue is resolved and I’m not paying a shitload next month.

I really love the CRPS UK group on Facebook. The people there are so kind and willing to help you out in anyway they can. I give back when I can. Some of the posts I can’t respond to because they are UK related, like disability keys and other admin from NHS or the government. But I can relate to pain posts and support those people. I love that everyone tries to help and responds to the posts. I have really gotten along with the founder of the group. She is so great. We were talking and I told her about how I was going to change my name to GC eventually. She was understanding and supportive.

I know I am going to have a shitty day because I am up in the middle of the night. I am not planning on going out at all. I want to rest my foot as much as possible. Sadly, I overspent and I don’t have much money to go on the cruise. I wanted at least $80 and I think I have like half that after all my bills are paid. I can’t touch my account until Friday. I wanted to get a haircut but it doesn’t seem like that is going to happen. I look like a Chia pet, my hair is just sprouting all out because it is growing like a weed. The parts that I have shaved before my admission to the hospital has grown out and is now even with the parts I didn’t shave. My hair grows so fast. I might have to withdraw from my savings if I don’t have enough cash on me.

There has been a lot of talk about transgender yesterday because the Orange Cheeto said they can no longer serve in the US military. Basically, it is because it “costs too much”. But yet they spend money on Viagra which is more expensive than the hormone therapy. I am very pissed off. I am so tired of the Cheeto not making good on his “promises” in his campaign and then has stupid rallies like he is still running for president. The guy is so deluded it’s not funny. It’s so sad that Congress is not doing anything to get rid of him. He is a lying piece of shit. I often call him a dumbfuck when I respond to his tweets. I can’t help it. He just pisses me off with his dumbass tweets.

I’m getting sleepy but I am also hungry. Think I will have a bowl of granola cereal and then try and sleep. Thing is, I really don’t want to go downstairs but I know I won’t be able to sleep unless I eat something. I wish I had something in my room. I used to have protein bars but I don’t anymore. I have to order some more.

About G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about. also writing about my daily struggle with chronic pain and how it affects my suicidality
This entry was posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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