Settling down for sleep…what a joke
For the past two hours, I have been trying to sleep. I couldn’t because musical hallucinations have been keeping me up. I was hearing the song “Peter Pan” by Kelsea Ballerini and it was just on repeat. So I bought the song so I could listen to it, hoping it would knock out the noise in my head. Then David Nail’s songs came through so I put his music on. Finally, I was tired enough to lie down. Yea Right.
Soon as I lied down, about not even 10 minutes later my foot exploded in pain. I just took my pain meds not even an hour ago so I couldn’t take anymore except for the strong pain pills. So I took one, even though I almost choked on it because it is a very small pill, potent, but small. I always have trouble swallowing it because it is small. I know I am in pain because I stood too long and walked a lot today.
Now I got to wait for the pain pill to work in about a half hour or so. The musical hallucinations are back but I don’t want to listen to anymore music. I will just let the music in my head play out. I am tempted to call my psychiatrist and ask her what to do but I am so tired, I might fall asleep on her. I might take another trilafon. I only took 4 mg today because I was out and about. I forgot to take it before leaving the house today.
God my foot hurts so damn bad. I hate when it is like this because there is nothing I can really do except wait for my meds to work. It has been fine up until now. I haven’t been in that much pain for most of the week. But then, I really didn’t stand or walk too much. I knew there was a chance of me hurting big time tonight. I figured it would be a test run for when I go to the Museum of Fine Arts. I really want to go now that I have my membership card. Frida Kahlo will be on exhibit soon and I can’t wait. I like her art. It can be a bit grotesque but she does have an interesting history.
I am glad I didn’t get a coffee when I was still in Harvard. I think I would still be awake rather than groggy. I just want to fucking sleep, dammit. I am glad I have nothing to do tomorrow, except for going to the bank to deposit a check. I might do it on my phone so I don’t have to leave the house. We’ll see how I feel tomorrow. I’ve only been out of the house two days this week. If I go to the bank, maybe I will have Chipotle again. The burrito I had was really good, even if it was messy. It will be my reward for going out.