TG Issues 8

TG Issues 8

The past few days my mother has been calling me “miss” or “Missy” to get my attention. I find it totally disrespectful. I am hurt that she calls me these names and she does it in a tone that I find so annoying. I almost said something today but I couldn’t bring myself to do it for fear of WWIII starting. My sisters are not in town so I wouldn’t have their support. It would be tough to talk to her about this without them here. I just am extremely upset about it and don’t know what to do.

I have thought about calling a transline hotline but I am not in crisis. I just want to talk to another TG person who understands what I am going through and might be able to help me. I feel like such a shit for not standing up for myself but this is my mother and I don’t want to hurt her. If it was anyone else, I probably would say something.

I’m feeling really frustrated by this and I don’t know what to do about it. I don’t think I will have a therapy session with my therapist tomorrow so the next time we speak won’t be until Tuesday. I just want to take my night meds and go to sleep, which I might do pretty soon. All I have been doing most of the day is sleeping.

I am still having the pain around my waist. I don’t know what is causing it at this point. It’s going away but not at a fast enough pace for me. The rain isn’t helping, either.

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About G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about
This entry was posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to TG Issues 8

  1. Ugh. Mothers know just where to prod you. They know your sore spots and your sensitivities. Sorry you’re the subject of her tender ministrations.

    • G. Collerone says:

      Sadly, she doesn’t know it’s a sore spot, yet. I have to talk with her but I’m scared

      • Being scared is understandable! I guess at some point we have to find the tipping point between two intolerable situations: do we continue to live with the bad situation we know already, or do we do an intervention that will likely change the situation in one way or another (but we don’t necessarily get to know exactly how)?

        In NLP the theory is that in order to change an interpersonal dynamic, only one of a dyad needs to change. So if my mother is tormenting me via her personality disorder, theoretically I can change the situation by, say, not getting defensive when she attacks me. But because she has a personality disorder this doesn’t work, as she perceives this to be some kind of attack on her! In the absence of a personality disorder it would be great for me to just say, Hey Mom, there’s something that’s really been bothering me. Can we talk about it?

        I guess it comes down to which thing makes us more uncomfortable…taking the risk, or dealing with the status quo.

any thoughts?

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