too many activities today

Too many activities today

I kind of forgot that my med alarm was set for like 0530 so I woke and it took me a little while to go back to sleep. I fell asleep when my mother went downstairs for breakfast. I woke up and was feeling okay. I wasn’t in a lot of pain so decided I was going to the grocery store to make the chili cornbread casserole.

I wore my boot. I also wore shorts as today was pretty warm. I tried to get crumpets but I didn’t see them. I’ll just have to order them on my monthly grocery order. I got the other ingredients and two dozen eggs. I was hurting but I was still okay. I had to let the frozen corn thaw so I went up to my room to print off the recipe. I was sweating as it was so damn warm. It’s only warm for today so I don’t mind. The temp is going to drop tomorrow and then more on Sunday. Monday is going to be raining. Fun.

I made the casserole. Then I made a frozen dinner as I had to cook the cornbread and couldn’t wait for it to come out. I figure I would have it for dinner. I cleaned up and washed the dishes. Then I went back upstairs. I must have been on the second or third step and my ankle said fuck you. I was hurting bad. My mother had taken the cane so I was stuck. No one was home. I just stood there like a flamingo trying not to put any weight on my foot and hoping the pain would settle down.

I eventually made it back up to my room, slowly. It was too early for me to take my pain meds. I just put my feet up and tried to relax so it wouldn’t hurt. Guess that shower I was hoping to take before bed is not happening. Tomorrow I need to bring the casserole to my barbers. I already called and told him. I might get a haircut. Depends on how I feel.

Published by

G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about. also writing about my daily struggle with chronic pain and how it affects my suicidality

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